My Daddy Has Cancer! How Do You Take Care Of Everyone

My husband has been diagnoised with stage 4.  It has been two weeks of PetScans, scopes, CScans, feeding tubes, Chemo Ports, etc.  They are looking at starting chemo and radiation on Monday. I am scared, hurt, and mad.  To see my husband so weak and in so much pain doesnt seem fair.  I feel helpless and hopeless, yet I try to sound positive and hopeful.  My daughter however is wathcing this all and is so upset.  We have no family within 500 miles and no friends or baby sitters.   How do I make sure he gets the help and support he needs, and still give her all the care see needs.  I am not to worried about myself.

Has anyone else gone through this with young children? 

Welcome to the board. I'm so sorry to hear about your husband.  How old in your daughter?  Is she school age, maybe old enough that you can call on help from other parents from her school?  I'm not sure where you live, but check with local agencies and see what kind of in home health care help you can get for your husband. Get the ball rolling now, as sometimes it takes a while for it to all get put in place. There are people that help, you just have to find them and ask.  Check with social services at the hospital handling his care They should be able to help direct you.

Thank you for the advise.   We do have a home nurse.   I have to say Mary Washington Hospital in Virginia, I have heard horrible stories, but they have treated us with the best care possible. 

I will look into some groups for Panda.... I hope to find something soon,

Thanks again for your support.... 

I am so sorry to hear of your husband's dx.  My husband also was dx and he is now recovering from the surgery.  What a horrible but necessary operation.  Anyway, we have four children and two are old enough to understand what is going on.  Our 5 year old talks to us a lot about it and we tell her in a way which we think she understands, but our 9 year old may know too much about cancer.  Her grandmother died of breast cancer and she never was able to meet her, and now she sees her Daddy with cancer.  She is very loving and open but doesn't really say much about this so I went to her school and spoke to the school social worker and it has been a godsend for us.  She talks to the social worker and the social worker keeps me up to date on what's going on.  Our daughter does not want us to worry about her worrying so this is a good way for her to get out what she needs to.  If she ever wants to talk with us we are always ready, but there is still someone else if need be.  I hope this might help your daughter because I think we worry just as much about our kids as we do our husbands at this point.  Anyway good luck with the next part of this and you sound very brave and that's what your husband needs.  But don't forget yourself.  I try to find a little quiet time to vent/cry when need be.  Use this message board there are a lot of positive things that may help.

-Strong4Him