What Is In Store For Next 6 Mos & What Should I Expect?

Only my Mother, my Sister and I remain - my Father passed away 13 yrs ago with Kidney Cancer. 

My Mother is 80 years old has heart problems, some blockage, has had mini strokes and now Bile Duct Cancer. In a nutshell we learned she had Bile Duct Cancer 11/29/06.  We knew by the time this was found it was advanced and the outlook was not too good - but we never could get the doctors to tell us what stage the cancer was in.  We were given examples, that many patients lived with this type of cancer for years before death occurred. 

My Mother was sent for 25 treatments of radiation and told it things got worse she would go to a major mediical center 75 miles away to a specialist.  Again, neither the Gastro-Internist or the Onocology Doctor  would never tell us the stage of her cancer.

Just recently after the radiation treatments ended (2 wks ago) my Mother got very sick, jaundiced, could not eat, etc.,.... After 2 wks of being extemely sick, the day before yesterday (Thursday) she was sent to a major medical center 75 miles away for a Endoscopic Ultrasound.    During the procedure they ended up putting in one stint on the right side and were not able to put a stint on the left side.

This evening - a day later - I learned from the specialist she is in Stage 3 (but no other organs are involved yet), the tumor is the size of a plum, they cannot operate and at the most they feel she might have 6 months (if even that long) left before death.

I was confused because the specialist implied he would have not have had her do radiation at that time and things might have been different if we came to them sooner..  

My Mother has always said she will not go into a Nursing Home and she hates hospitals.  I just am at a loss.  Not only confused, but I don't know what to expect for the next few months.  I do not know if as in many cancers this will soon spread to other organs and if extremem pain is common with this cancer.

I am not sure how my sister and I can work and still care for my Mother until the end without help, without hospital care or round the clock care. .  We want to do the best we can for her - but don't want her to feel in her last days abandoned.  As well, how can we give full care to her, work a full-time job and still nurture our children and husbands.

Most of I want to find out if there is a time table of what happens in most of these cases and at what time (paim, loss of memory, etc.) occurs.  I know all people and the cancer affects people differently.  Any information would help.  I am at such a loss.  Today learning this news was a shock.  To give the best care, I would like to be somewhat prepared for the coming months and know what may happen or what to expect ---if one can ever be prepared.

 Anyone who has been through this, please pass on your experience and advice.

Angie 

 

 

 

 

Hi sweetie, My sweet mother was diagnosed with bile duct cancer on 10/2/06.  She has done several rounds of chemo and is now encouraged to stop and they have given her 4-6 months.  They gave us the number for hospice.  My mom's tumor was on her liver the size of a golf ball, it had spread from her bile duct originally very small spots on her bile duct, it spread to her lungs very quickly even with chemo treatments.  We are now trying to make her as comfortable as possible and allow her to do the things she wants to do, spending as much time with her as possible.  I have 2 small kids and a wonderful husband and I'm a school teacher so I know it's so hard.  We go down every weekend luckily they only live 40 minutes away.  My principal has allowed for me to take off every Friday for the rest of the year to be with her and I will take a leave of abscence when the time comes.  She may pass over the summer so it may not be necessary.  She was given the 4 -6 month window just last week.  My heart breaks for you as no one truly understands but someone going through it.  My mom's tumor etc. was inoperable from the start so that was never an option.  She is a young 71.  Before this was very active, teaching water aerobics, etc. Our hearts are broken.  I will be praying for you and your family during this difficult time.  My mom even with several rounds of chemo and now with stopping it is still very coherent and with it.  I wonder if it will change quickly as she will surely be taking more pain meds.  I wish I had more answers for you.  Just that this is a nasty cancer and I do believe it's a fast growing one.  God bless you, my thoughts and prayers will be with you!! --Vicky

 

On 3/1/2007 Angies wrote:

Only my Mother, my Sister and I remain - my Father passed away 13 yrs ago with Kidney Cancer. 

My Mother is 80 years old has heart problems, some blockage, has had mini strokes and now Bile Duct Cancer. In a nutshell we learned she had Bile Duct Cancer 11/29/06.  We knew by the time this was found it was advanced and the outlook was not too good - but we never could get the doctors to tell us what stage the cancer was in.  We were given examples, that many patients lived with this type of cancer for years before death occurred. 

My Mother was sent for 25 treatments of radiation and told it things got worse she would go to a major mediical center 75 miles away to a specialist.  Again, neither the Gastro-Internist or the Onocology Doctor  would never tell us the stage of her cancer.

Just recently after the radiation treatments ended (2 wks ago) my Mother got very sick, jaundiced, could not eat, etc.,.... After 2 wks of being extemely sick, the day before yesterday (Thursday) she was sent to a major medical center 75 miles away for a Endoscopic Ultrasound.    During the procedure they ended up putting in one stint on the right side and were not able to put a stint on the left side.

This evening - a day later - I learned from the specialist she is in Stage 3 (but no other organs are involved yet), the tumor is the size of a plum, they cannot operate and at the most they feel she might have 6 months (if even that long) left before death.

I was confused because the specialist implied he would have not have had her do radiation at that time and things might have been different if we came to them sooner..  

My Mother has always said she will not go into a Nursing Home and she hates hospitals.  I just am at a loss.  Not only confused, but I don't know what to expect for the next few months.  I do not know if as in many cancers this will soon spread to other organs and if extremem pain is common with this cancer.

I am not sure how my sister and I can work and still care for my Mother until the end without help, without hospital care or round the clock care. .  We want to do the best we can for her - but don't want her to feel in her last days abandoned.  As well, how can we give full care to her, work a full-time job and still nurture our children and husbands.

Most of I want to find out if there is a time table of what happens in most of these cases and at what time (paim, loss of memory, etc.) occurs.  I know all people and the cancer affects people differently.  Any information would help.  I am at such a loss.  Today learning this news was a shock.  To give the best care, I would like to be somewhat prepared for the coming months and know what may happen or what to expect ---if one can ever be prepared.

 Anyone who has been through this, please pass on your experience and advice.

*********************************************************************** 

Angie 

I just learned of this site- I wish i could have found it sooner.  I noticed you posted this message a while back- i hope all is well. 

I would like to share my experience with you as well.  My mom was recovering from breast cancer since March 2004.  On Nov. 14 2006 my mom was admitted in the hospital for what was thought to be gall stones stuck in her bile duct.  A few doctors in the hospital suspected differently.  A couple days later they suspected it was cancer.  We were transferred to a hospital 2 hours away at 2am on Thanksgiving. There they were suppose to do the surgery to remove the tumour.  When the doctors there looked at her scans and results they decided the tumour was unresectable and had spread to the liver and possibly the pancreas.  She had the drainage tubes to drain her liver (she had been getting jaundice since about Nov. 11th.)  We had her go thru many procedures for tests, and she got the port put in for chemo.  We were discharged on Dec. 1, 2006 with a life expectancy of 6-8 months and hopes of treatment once we got the biopsy results- unfortunately we found out the biopsy was unsuccessful. 

My mom seemed fine, with the exception of the jaundice. I thought we would make it thru the holidays and do everything one step at a time- On Dec. 13th my mom gave in and took Hospice up on their offer for a hospital bed (by the way- Hospice was wonderful- I could have never done it without them) 12am on Dec. 16th my mom started to show signs of active dying- 6 hours later she was gone.  Hospice could get you literature to read so you can watch for signs.  They also provide grief counseling and groups for families- (services for children also)

It all happened so fast for me-- i just remember crying every day when i was not with her- I was very scared.  I spent everyday with my mom- mornings ( I would go to work late), take long lunches to be with her and again after work.  I spent as much time with her as i could and told her I loved her all the time.

To this day it still seems unbelievable.  My mom had recently turned 64.  In the blink of an eye she was gone-  you are not thinking of losing ur loved one any time soon- then all of a sudden they have a life expectancy of 6-8 months and only make it 15 days.  i have heard the horror stories of things happening so quick, but i was to quick to believe that couldn't happen to us.

 Again, I truely hope all is well with your family and your mom.  I know how you feel- and i am so sorry

 

 

 

 

During the month of Aprli 2006, my wife and I went to Ireland and had a great time. She showed no sign of illness. Around the middle of September, she came out on the back porch with me to eat breakfast, and she asked me to look her over, that she felt like she was turning yellow. I looked and detected a shade of yellow. I advised her we need to make an appointment with our Urologist who treated her for Kidney Stones in February 2006 thinking it may be related. The Dr. advised us she had Yellow Jaundice, and he made an appointment at the hospital. While in the hospital she was given a Endoscopic Exam, and the results showed a restriction in the Bile Duct. The Dr. inserted a stint in the right Bile Duct, for it to drain, and instructed us to see an Gastrointerologist for further examination. We went to San Antonio and had a CT Scan performed that indicated possible restriction of the Bile Duct due to a tumor. Another stint was inserted in the left Bile Duct. The next step was to meet with a surgeon. The surgeon advised us my wife had a 60 or greater percent chance of having Klatskin's Tumor or Bile Duct Cancer. He said the tumor appeared close to the Liver, but he would not know unless he performed surgery. We had a choice at that time to either continue replacing stints every three months for a period of a year, which is the length of time Drs. could replace stints and then it is over or, perform surgery in hopes they could remove the cancer. We elected to perform surgery. It was a toss of the dice and we lost. If we had it to do over again, we would have gone with stints for a year, and my dear wife would have been with me a year longer. Hindsight is 20/20. On November 14, 2006, my wife was operated on at the University Hospital in San Antonio. Drs. removed her Bile Duct and performed a Bile Duct Resection, and found cancer in her Liver. They removed half her Liver. After surgery she still had a small amount of cancer in her remaining Liver that we hoped would be removed by Chemotherapy. I brought her home on November 22, 2006, and she had massive amounts of fluid leakage all throughout Thanksgiving. She did not feel well. I brought her back to the hospital on November 27, and the Dr. said something was wrong and sent her back into surgery. The stitches holding the Bile Duct to the Intestines had come loose, and fluid was leaking back into her system causing infection and more Jaundice. They repaired the stitches however, they where not optimistic it would hold because the tissue was weak at that location. She started getting sick again, and lots of fluid was flowing, another surgery revealed the stitches did not hold, and they again restitched without much hope. Finally, after a week she again was weak and very sick. Drs. Did MRI and CT Scan, and they couldn't figure out what was wrong. On December 18, she went Back into surgery for the fourth time, and the Dr. advised me her Liver was degenerating and nothing further could be done for her. Dr. gave her 2 days to a week because her Kidneys where shutting down. On December 22, 2006, I had an ambulance pick her up at the hospital and deliver her to our home in Junction,Texas. I made arrangements for Hospice to be there, and with there able assistance, we kept her at home for five weeks where we administered Morphine for pain, and Ativan for anxiety. I was the only caregiver at the time, and I remained with her twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. Hospice was wonderful, they are like Angels, appearing when you need them the most, and I live way out in the country. After five weeks at home, it became to overwhelming for me because of her needs, that I transferred her to a Nursing Home in Fredericksburg, Texas so I would have assistance caring for her. Hospice continued to visit us at the Nursing Home. My wife finally passed away on St. Valentine's Day, February 14, 2006. I showed her the flowers I had delivered to her, told her I loved her, said she sure was pretty, and she calmly drifted away. She was 67. Each case is different, the decision to operate or not is a personal one. Klatskin's Tumor is a very rare cancer, and difficult to detect. Look up Klatskin's Tumor on the internet for more information. Good luck and God be with you during this difficult time.          

 

    

Hi all, I wrote recently about my mom's bile duct cancer and stopping chemo.  The doctor's said there was nothing else they could do for her.  They gave her 4-6 months at the end of Feb.  My sweet mama went to be with Jesus on Sun. April 1st.  We were all together.  Hospice had been called in just a few weeks before and she passed at home with all her kids and my dad around her.  She was diagnosed on Oct. 2nd and lived almost exactly 6 months from diagnosis.  It goes so fast!!!!!  I urge you...anyone going through this PLEASE spend as much time with your loved one as possible.  This is a terrible cancer and my heart hurts so much to not have her here.  The peace I have though is that she is no longer in pain and has a new body in heaven.  She had to give up singing which she loved, I have peace that I believe she is singing again in heaven as my guardian angel.  God bless you all going through this, I pray for miracles for you.  My heart hurts for you too, as I would never wish this upon anyone.  God bless you and keep you!!!  - Vicky