My mom has been diagnosed with PC

Hi everyone, my mom has been diagnosed with a pancreatic tumour (carcinogenic...I do not know how to spell it) surrounded by edema on the bottom of her pancreas.   She is 64 years old and has always been extremely healthy.  She was always more fit than most 25 year olds.  This past 6 months or so she was complaining about a pain on the lower left hand side (directly below her ribcage) of her abdomen.  The doctors were telling her it was her IBS and kept increasing her meds.  This past Xmas, everytime she ate, she would have such pain and would vomit anything she digested within one hour.  She has since lost approx. 35lbs (she was not large to begin with) and last month they misdiagnosed her with pancreatis and accused her of excessive drinking (she is not much of a drinker and had not even had one drink in several months).  My mom started to feel better but suddenly last week she became ill again.  We brought her into the hospital and they ran more tests on her, gave her an ultrasound and a CT scan and this is when they discovered the tumour.  We will not know the actual stage of cancer until this Wednesday, when we have the consultation with the specialist. 

I cannot begin to describe the sadness and fear we are feeling.  My mother has been living with my daughter and I for most of my daughters life (she is 17) and it has always been the three of us.  We are very close and we have always been each other's anchor.  The devastation everyone is feeling is immense.  My mom is so frail already, without even beginning treatment.  She keeps trying to gain weight, but it just doesn't seem to be working. 

My mom is trying to keep her spirits up and "act normal" but I can see the fear in her and it is heart breaking.   I have been secretly crying because I do not want her to know how frighten I am because she has always thought of me as the "strong one."  I do not know what to expect, or how long she will have or how I can make things better for her.  She was always so vibrant and full of energy....we are all so scared.

On 3/3/2007 Mcginnis Girl wrote:

Hi everyone, my mom has been diagnosed with a pancreatic tumour (carcinogenic...I do not know how to spell it) surrounded by edema on the bottom of her pancreas.   She is 64 years old and has always been extremely healthy.  She was always more fit than most 25 year olds.  This past 6 months or so she was complaining about a pain on the lower left hand side (directly below her ribcage) of her abdomen.  The doctors were telling her it was her IBS and kept increasing her meds.  This past Xmas, everytime she ate, she would have such pain and would vomit anything she digested within one hour.  She has since lost approx. 35lbs (she was not large to begin with) and last month they misdiagnosed her with pancreatis and accused her of excessive drinking (she is not much of a drinker and had not even had one drink in several months).  My mom started to feel better but suddenly last week she became ill again.  We brought her into the hospital and they ran more tests on her, gave her an ultrasound and a CT scan and this is when they discovered the tumour.  We will not know the actual stage of cancer until this Wednesday, when we have the consultation with the specialist. 

I cannot begin to describe the sadness and fear we are feeling.  My mother has been living with my daughter and I for most of my daughters life (she is 17) and it has always been the three of us.  We are very close and we have always been each other's anchor.  The devastation everyone is feeling is immense.  My mom is so frail already, without even beginning treatment.  She keeps trying to gain weight, but it just doesn't seem to be working. 

My mom is trying to keep her spirits up and "act normal" but I can see the fear in her and it is heart breaking.   I have been secretly crying because I do not want her to know how frighten I am because she has always thought of me as the "strong one."  I do not know what to expect, or how long she will have or how I can make things better for her.  She was always so vibrant and full of energy....we are all so scared.

 

I'm so sorry to hear your story...My dad has pc and was diagnosed in July 2006. At the moment he is holding his own but there are so many different things that happen..I cannot imagine how you are feeling, being so close to your mum.You do need to be strong at this time for her.

If you need to talk Maybe we can help eachother?

So sorry

Fran 

My dad was diagnosed in Nov.2006 with P/C. I live with my parents and I have 2 sons that live with us. This is very hard to go through and watch him waste away. He eats good but he gags and has to stop eating or he gets sick. He's lost 38 pounds since Nov. 29th. Spend as much time as you can making every moment special.

My dad is taking chemo, Gemzar. I thank God everyday for having my daddy.

I'm sorry you are going through this. I pray for God's will to be done in all our lives.

Lisa N SC 

My Dear:

I feel for you more than you know. My darling mother, my best friend, passed away just over one week ago after a 5 month battle with PC. In looking back, it was the emotional torment that she went thru that bothers me more than anything. For the physical discomfort I could give her more pain meds. For the emotional pain there was no magic pill and certainly no magic words. My mother lived in fear from the moment she found out until the moment she drew her last breath. I begged her to join me and seek either group or individual support. She refused. That is a very difficult concept for people of that age group (my mother was 68.) So she chose to "suffer in silence" and it just killed me. I wish I could offer you more encouraging words, but you said you hate the look of hear on her face and I just wanted you to know you are not alone - I know exactly how you feel. Bless you, your mother, and your entire family.

I am very sorry to hear about your Mom.  I know exactly what you are dealing with, my Mom was diagnosed 2 1/2 years ago.  They told us that she had a 15% chance to make it 2 years.  My Mom is very tough and has made it longer than anyone around our area with this terrible diagnosis.  My Mom was able to have surgery to remove 3/4 of her pancreas.  She did not and could not do chemo until her weight was stable and she waited until the pain was so bad that she could not take it anymore.  The chemo they used was gemzar and it worked for a while.  I really think it is why she is still fighting the disease today.  But, her quality of life is not good.  We have hospice helping us care for her, she lost about 50 lbs and maybe weighs 75 lbs now.  The end is close from what hospice says.  It is very hard to see your loved one everyday with pain and stomach problems.  My advise to you is love her everyday and leave no thing unsaid.  I would call this a roller coaster and we have been on it a long time.  It is very hard to deal with, but seek out help from anyone that offers.  That was my mistake,I tried to do it all, I have a family of my own.  2 kids ages 2 1/2 and 10 at the time of diagnosis.  We take it one day at a time and put our faith in god that he will stop the pain and suffering soon for her.  This web site has really helped me, talking to other caregivers.  It's nice to know that we are not alone in what you are feeling and dealing with. I pray for all of your family, keep me posted on how things are going.

On 3/3/2007 Franchamp wrote:

 

On 3/3/2007 Mcginnis Girl wrote:

Hi everyone, my mom has been diagnosed with a pancreatic tumour (carcinogenic...I do not know how to spell it) surrounded by edema on the bottom of her pancreas.   She is 64 years old and has always been extremely healthy.  She was always more fit than most 25 year olds.  This past 6 months or so she was complaining about a pain on the lower left hand side (directly below her ribcage) of her abdomen.  The doctors were telling her it was her IBS and kept increasing her meds.  This past Xmas, everytime she ate, she would have such pain and would vomit anything she digested within one hour.  She has since lost approx. 35lbs (she was not large to begin with) and last month they misdiagnosed her with pancreatis and accused her of excessive drinking (she is not much of a drinker and had not even had one drink in several months).  My mom started to feel better but suddenly last week she became ill again.  We brought her into the hospital and they ran more tests on her, gave her an ultrasound and a CT scan and this is when they discovered the tumour.  We will not know the actual stage of cancer until this Wednesday, when we have the consultation with the specialist. 

I cannot begin to describe the sadness and fear we are feeling.  My mother has been living with my daughter and I for most of my daughters life (she is 17) and it has always been the three of us.  We are very close and we have always been each other's anchor.  The devastation everyone is feeling is immense.  My mom is so frail already, without even beginning treatment.  She keeps trying to gain weight, but it just doesn't seem to be working. 

My mom is trying to keep her spirits up and "act normal" but I can see the fear in her and it is heart breaking.   I have been secretly crying because I do not want her to know how frighten I am because she has always thought of me as the "strong one."  I do not know what to expect, or how long she will have or how I can make things better for her.  She was always so vibrant and full of energy....we are all so scared.

 

I'm so sorry to hear your story...My dad has pc and was diagnosed in July 2006. At the moment he is holding his own but there are so many different things that happen..I cannot imagine how you are feeling, being so close to your mum.You do need to be strong at this time for her.

If you need to talk Maybe we can help eachother?

So sorry

Fran 

 

Thank you for the kind words, I am sorry I have not responded earlier, my family has flown here and I have been very busy.  

I am so sorry to learn about your father, my heart goes out to you.  I would like very much to be supportive of each other in this trying times.

Sincerely,

Bobbi 

 

You are an amazing person.  I am so very sorry to hear about your mom. 

We are just in the beginning (consultants, biopsy, etc...) my mom has a tumor on the tail of the pancreas, her lymphodes surrounding this area seem to be swollen.  I know nothing else at the moment except that time is of an essence.

I will try and contact this board as often as possible, as this board seems to give me strength.  My family is here to see my mom and between the family and work, I find it very difficult to find free time.  I have decided to take things day by day and hope for the best for my mom.  She will be staying with me until the end and I only want her to live as comfortable as possible.  She must be terrified and I want to support her as much as possible.

Thanks so very much for your reply. 

Bobbi

My Prayers are with everyone here........

It literally tears me apart reading all of these- how similar our stories are...how helpless we feel!  How can this be as undetectable in the early stages......we start w/ a mammogram at 35- followed up every year after 40.  With all the money being spent on finding cures (which I'm ALL) for, maybe there should be an all out Cancer Screening starting at a certain age.....I don't know...

We are a month into my Mom's diagnosis of Stage IV w/ met. to the liver.  She has started Gemzer & Tarceva and our hearts are breaking to think this is for real.  What really seems to help me stay positive, is to believe that God is in control- then pool together all the strength my Mom has taught me over the years.  I tell her that it's "Her Turn" to teach strength to others by getting thru this and proving that ONLY God knows how long we have to live.  You can't give up!  This is an excellent forum- sadly because it makes us feel- not-so-alone........but also the common idea that hope is out there- just don't give up until you find it.  And remember, 'time' is a precious thing- and even though it is spent watching her fight to live.....LIVING, she is!

Maria

I am so sorry for your loss - my hubby has stage IV PC mets to the liver

he has has 3 chemos and next week he starts a series of 4.  They won't do another CAT until three months after the first chemo so we will wait until may - No knowing is terrible - but we have strong faith in God and we will belive for a complete healing -