Lost Without My Husband

My husband died in November of 2007 from stomach cancer.  We were married for only 2 years but were together for 10 years.  Since his passing, I am completely lost and really don't know what to do with myself.  I have found that I am angry alot, particularly with God for taking him away from me and my daughter.  The transition for both of us has been really hard.  He truly was the love of my life.  I find it really difficult to believe that at 37 years old that I am widowed.  Does anyone have any advice on how I can maintain my sanity?

Any advice would be much appreciated.

Sincerely,

Janeen

Hi Janeen,

I'm so sorry you & your daughter have to go through so much pain.  Have you considered attending a grief support group?  My sister lost her husband of 42 yrs and found the grief support group very helpful for the first year or so.  She also now volunteers at a pregnancy shelter for unmarried girls and women.  Are you a spiritual person; if so, volunteer work somewhere might help you focus outside yourself for part of the time.  Helping at a hospital, reading to children at a library, cooking at a homeless shelter, organizing a food pantry at your church; any of these worthwhile acts of charity would also be a good example for your daughter if she is of an age to be aware.  

I hope you find some peace.

Joan 

I'm so sorry for you loss, this is the first time I've been able to stand to come back to this web site. I loss my husband in March, we'd been together for 8 years and only been married a couple of months.  I feel like I've lost my other half.  We worked together in the same dept. also so I can't ever seem to find a place that doen't remind me of him.

I know what you mean I'm 34 and thought we'd have years together, you are lucky to have you daughter. We never had kids though he'd wanted one I never felt like the time was right.  It's been real hard to want to go on but last weekend I just started to do stuff to keep me busy, I'm not sure if it works for everyone but it seems to help some. But I still have him in the back of mind always, I think I will always.  Friends have said grief counciling could help, I havn't done it but it could help some.  My mom's been there for me alot, don't think I could have got this far without her. 

 I do think talking about helps and crying too. I know it's hard some days, it feels like someone has kicked me in the stomach and I can't breath for the pain and I'm lossing or misplaceing stuff, some times I can't seem to keep a straight thought. A couple old friends that have lost their husbands say it just takes time and to stay busy. I hope your able to find something that helps, I know it's hard.

Sinicerly,      Rain