My Husband Has 2 Mybe 3 Months

Hi I was reading some messages posted and read that some have done this thing called interferon..Well my husband first had melanoma in 2005 which had spread to his lymph nodes under his left arm(the mole was on his chest) they removed them and more suface area and basically said everything was fine and sent him on his way.Well june 29 06 the cancer came back and had spread to several organs,brain,bone,muscle and he has several tumars on his body visible that almost look like boils or cists. So my question is,Is it to late for that interferon that people are talking about??In one month he went from having one tumar on his brain to now having eleven just on his brain.He had radiation but obvisouly did not work.They are giving him 2 maybe 3 months..please give any advice..They said chemo would make him more sick so he decided not to do it and only 30% chance it would keep the cancer at bay...Please help with any advice or comments

my suggestion is hospice.  No therapy is proven to help much at this stage.  Hospice can be a blessing to you and your family during these next few months.  With brain mets he may become unresponsive for weeks so do and say everything now, while you can.

Thank you for your input...He just got inrolled in hospice last week and so far they have been very helpfull.I just can't understand why they didn't suggest more treatment options sooner.He is only 35.It's just not fair.He has been having some different side effects and they say it's a combo of the tumars and the pain meds.I try to talk to him and have conversation but he talks about something else completely off the wall that doesn't make sense.Is that the pain meds?We have only been married a year and three months I just don't understand why???

If he was diagnosed at stage 3 (+ LN) he should have been offered interferon for 1 yr.  IF stage 2, then surgery alone, but either way he should have recieved regular checkups to watch for signs of recurrence.  His confusion is most likely from a combination of brain mets and pain meds.  Any plans, like gamma knife, for the brain mets?  As for the, why us question, its a good one.  Perhaps an even better question is, why not you?

 

Just read your post.

You and your husband are in my prayers.

Blessings,

Beth

I hope I've misinterpreted one of the responses as to why not you?  No one deserves to be in your position.  My daughter is 31 married almost 2 years in October and I can't imagine what it would be like for her to have found herself in your position.  Your husband is extremely lucky to have found you in his life.  I'm extremely sad that you both haven't had the opportunity to have a normal life as most young couples.  My sister lost her fiance last year to melanoma as well.  He had three young children, the youngest 5 so my thoughts are with you.  Hospice is indeed the best place for his care.  I will pray for him and for you.  God bless!

 

On 8/6/2007 Oncrx wrote:

If he was diagnosed at stage 3 (+ LN) he should have been offered interferon for 1 yr.  IF stage 2, then surgery alone, but either way he should have recieved regular checkups to watch for signs of recurrence.  His confusion is most likely from a combination of brain mets and pain meds.  Any plans, like gamma knife, for the brain mets?  As for the, why us question, its a good one.  Perhaps an even better question is, why not you?

 

Oncrx,  I read a lot of your responses on this site and up until now have thought you to be a compassionate, caring person.  I cannot believe you could be so cold as to ask someone in this situation "why not you".  This is unthinkable.  They do not need added stress at this point; they need good advice and lots of prayers.

 

On 8/6/2007 Oncrx wrote:

If he was diagnosed at stage 3 (+ LN) he should have been offered interferon for 1 yr.  IF stage 2, then surgery alone, but either way he should have recieved regular checkups to watch for signs of recurrence.  His confusion is most likely from a combination of brain mets and pain meds.  Any plans, like gamma knife, for the brain mets?  As for the, why us question, its a good one.  Perhaps an even better question is, why not you?

 

How darethe health care provider for her reply.  I really believe it is harder on the caregiver than the patient.  My husband agrees with me.  By the way we both have cancer.  His started in 04 and mine this march.  Our prayers are with you.

 

My husband was exactly the same - he was 37 - we have 2 children - it is so tough - they become a person you don't know anymore and you feel lost. Putting Nick in a hospice was the best thing I did - they are the best people in the world.  Take heart - it is so tough but you will get through - if you need me e-mail --Message edited by CancerCompass staff. For personal protection, email address removed. Consider private reply. Please review CancerCompass Member Guidelines at http://www.cancercompass.com/common/guidelines.html--

I completely understand the "why is this happening to me" thing.  I lost my wife July 22nd to Melanoma.  She was only 30 and we have a 5 year old little girl.  Looking back, it seemed to happen so fast.  She was diagnosed on Valentines day of this year and died 5 months and a half months later.  Why has this happened to me???  I live with that question on the tip of my tounge.