Thanks so much for your kind words! I really dislike having "unknown primary" because you can't really talk to anyone about it. They don't get that it's not like other cancers. Oh well. I'm not brave, you just do what you gotta do! They just changed my chemo today. Now I'm taking Carboplatin and Taxol instead of Carboplatin and Gemcitibine.
I'm stage 4 too because there are 4 masses in my liver, but even though the prognosis is totally awful, no one really knows what will happen. My CT scan showed no growth after 2 cycles with Gemcitibine, so at least that is 2 months to the good!
My big problem (other than the cancer itself of course!) is the money. I'm now on State insurance, which is good, but I am my sole support and I can't work full time anymore. I don't know if I can go out of state for anything. I doubt it. I spend most of my time stressing about how I'm to pay rent and utilities and phone! It takes 6 months to wait for Social Security Disability and that's at the far end of my prognosis at this point. I have NO CLUE how someone is supposed to live for 6 months on virtually nothing. Sigh... my problem at least I'm still here to complain about it!
Please don't feel guilty about "not knowing" I didn't know anything either - no symptoms, and I was seeing my primary doctor and testing everything for a cough that wouldn't go away. I finally got "allowed" to see a pulmonary specialist after a 4 month wait and she's the one who ordered a CT scan of my chest. Incidently to that they could see part of my liver and they could see the tumors. That's how they found I even HAD cancer. No one knows why these things happen, but the least amount of good is done by feeling guilty over what you "didn't" do!
Blessings to you and your family, I hope you heal soon from the immediate pain and continue to grow and thrive happily and with good health. My Dad died in an accident when I was 9 yrs old. Hey, it still "hurts" but you do get past that most awful sense of loss.
Hugz,
Patti