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Numb And Sad

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Subject: Numb and sad
Date: 10/04/2007

My mother was just recently dianosed with O.cancer, stage four. 

 I am so new to this and never thought she would ever get sick. She did and with one of the worst cancers for women. I am scared, feel hopless, numb, etc... 

She had her first chemo treatment monday. Thought she did well, but it was a long 6 1/2 hour day. I guess the first one is long. Well, she started to throw-up the next morning and until the day after. Her vomit was a dark chocolate color. I was worried thinking it was maybe internal bleeding. But from what the nurses had told us, if she is throwing up that looks like coffe grinds then be alarmed. She was not throwing up the "coffee grinds."

We finally decided to take her in to the er and they jumped to her giving her iv's for dehydration, reverse her cumadin for blood thinners (her blood was so thin), 4 units of plasma, etc. She was bleeding internally. Is this common for someone going through chemo? I heard it can be, It was so awful to see my mom in this condition, Never have and it scared me. 

One  nurse told my sister and I to be prepared for the "bumps in the road."

Will she and can she recover from this? I know there is no cure, but is there hope? She looked awful, but is now in good hands. The prior hospital we took her to was not a great experience. I felt they just really did not care. Granted, I do like her oncologist, but felt the whole situation at the hospital was negative. Not a good feeling.

We are also integrating the alterntive stuff as well.

I know the first treatment is suppose to be bad, but she had all these problems that persisted. Just when I thought I could be somewhat strong, the news that she had cancer, then something else comes up.

What to do? The nurse suggested that we go to support groups and then we had another nurse tell us that my mom's cancer is bad and that support groups may not help. And she also mentioned that the chemo is just probably giving her comfort and will shrink the tumors but that too is also to give her comfort.

I felt depressed and hopeless after I heard that from her. We just stopped to ask her about the chemo clinic that they offered at the hospital because we want to transfer my mom to that hospital.  She was a chemo clinic nurse. After a brief conversation, she mentioned all this stuff to us. I felt like crying.

 I sometimes feel strong and other times I do not. I cry and feel no strength. But when I do log onto this site and read a lot of research on many other sites with stats and survivors, I gain my hope back.

Such a long note, but I needed to confide in someone. 

Any advice and hope would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. 

Subject: RE: Numb and sad
Date: 10/04/2007

My prayers go out to you and your family.  I remember when the news came with my mom.......She is the ROCK of our family and to get the news just thru us all for a loop.  How old is your mom and did they do surg.? There are alot of people here to help you and give you hope. My mom is still alive at 68 she was dx 17 yrs ago.

My mom had so many Bumps in the Road but you know what? She said she would do it again cause it was all worth it.

Praying, crying, screaming Believing do what you got to do it all works and its okay, you can't be strong all the time.

Always go with your gut feeling, if it don't feel right then look for a place that does.

May God be with us all, pam

Subject: RE: Numb and sad
Date: 10/04/2007
All of the emotions you are feeling are perfectly normal. I remember feeling the same things when I was diagnosed in Nov. 2005. I've gradually come to accept it but I still have my bad days, we all do. You are right, those of us with stage IV know there is no cure, but there is hope. Its been 2 years now for me and every sucess story gives me that much more hope. You and your mother are in my prayers. Please tell her not to give up. It is a rough road with lots of bumps but knowing there are so many others out there going through the same thing makes the road a little less bumpy. Hopefully things will start to ease up some for your mother as she gets further along into her treatments and she will start to feel better, and so will you. More important if you feel she isn't getting the treatment she needs by all means don't hesitate to find another Dr. I pray your mother makes it over this "bump" in the road and begins to see improvement. You hang in there too.   Chris
Subject: RE: Numb and sad
Date: 10/06/2007
hi! the main thing is to BE positive, sound positive, take each day one at a time, take advantage of the good days (usually week 2&3) & get get as much quality time as poss! there are a lot of us out there, and we are in fighting mode! slay that dragon! harriet
Subject: RE: Numb and sad
Date: 10/10/2007

 

On 10/4/2007 chris1 wrote:

All of the emotions you are feeling are perfectly normal. I remember feeling the same things when I was diagnosed in Nov. 2005. I've gradually come to accept it but I still have my bad days, we all do. You are right, those of us with stage IV know there is no cure, but there is hope. Its been 2 years now for me and every sucess story gives me that much more hope. You and your mother are in my prayers. Please tell her not to give up. It is a rough road with lots of bumps but knowing there are so many others out there going through the same thing makes the road a little less bumpy. Hopefully things will start to ease up some for your mother as she gets further along into her treatments and she will start to feel better, and so will you. More important if you feel she isn't getting the treatment she needs by all means don't hesitate to find another Dr. I pray your mother makes it over this "bump" in the road and begins to see improvement. You hang in there too.   Chris

hi chris! glad u're fine! & that u are doing well after being dx'ed stage 4! did u get any special treatment besides carboplatin & taxol?

harriet

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