I'm a rectal cancer survivor, more than two years now, and have radiation proctitis. LIFE is good, but bowel movements are frequent, and you just have to get used to the "new normal".
I NEVER stay home, but I have certain strategies that work for me.
Find the bathroom in any environment as soon as you enter the new area, and always know where it is.
Take Immodium proactively (before you have a problem) and it removes some of the excess water from your intestines that can't be easily removed now that the rectal area is less.My surgeon told me this, and it WORKS pretty well. I take a half dose an hour before going out to dinner with friends.
If you are going to be doing something (like kayaking, I'm an avid kayaker, and went on a Caribbean cruise for ten days less than four months after my surgery, and I was STILL on oral chemo during this time.)... anyway, if you are doing something active swimming, running, kayaking, etc., and won't have access to a bathroom, don't eat for a few hours before you go. On the cruise, I ate breakfast, and dinner and skipped lunch most of the time. I'd have a half of healthy granola bar, or something, to keep from being hungry, but not enough to trigger a trip to the restroom/bathroom.
Keep track of what you can't eat without triggering multiple bowel movements, and then only eat that late at night, or when you know you aren't going out (if you crave it). Soon, you will avoid anything that gives you problems because it's not worth it most of the time.
You can sometimes gently reintroduce a food to get your system used to it. At first caffeine gave me problems, but I slowly got my body acclimated to coffee again. I'd start with a 1/3 cup, then increased. Now I can drink two large cups at a time and not have problems. However, if I add chocolate to expresso... oops... watch out. Even that's too much caffeine for me...
Small portions of everything help. The less in your system, the easier it is to manage.
Hope these tips help. You need to figure out what works for you. It's taken two years to get it under control (somewhat), but LIFE IS STILL GOOD, and I don't avoid going out. I live my life! Hope you can, too!