My Mom Has Passed

I wanted to thank those of you who were praying for my Mom.  It was almost 6 months to the day she died after being diagnosed with gallbladder cancer.  If we had it to do over again, we would not do the chemo.  She was given 6-8 months without it, but MD Anderson said she could live years if she did it.  She lived 6 months and because of the chemo was sick and couldn't even enjoy those last 6 months.  It was a horrible death and I am having nightmares from watching her die like that.  This is a horrible cancer and I pray they find a cure in our lifetime.

Eileen

Eileen,

I am so sorry for the loss of your mom and the suffering you have all endured these past months.  I will be joining you in a matter of hours, as I am sitting by my 62 old mom's hospital bed trying to say goodbye.  My mom was diagnosed 8 months ago and also had Chemo.  They only gave her around 3 mos. without is so I am glad we tried.  Although she was so sick,  I was thankful to still have her.  Now, she is suffering so and I can not imagine life without her but want her at peace.  I am alone in this as I have no siblings and am her sole caregiver, but it helps to know there are others like us out there.  Maybe this site can help others and can find a way to increase awareness of these horrible organ cancers.  I hope your days ahead will bring joy and peace.

Take care,

Sherry 

 

 

On 12/29/2007 Smlev wrote:

Eileen,

I am so sorry for the loss of your mom and the suffering you have all endured these past months.  I will be joining you in a matter of hours, as I am sitting by my 62 old mom's hospital bed trying to say goodbye.  My mom was diagnosed 8 months ago and also had Chemo.  They only gave her around 3 mos. without is so I am glad we tried.  Although she was so sick,  I was thankful to still have her.  Now, she is suffering so and I can not imagine life without her but want her at peace.  I am alone in this as I have no siblings and am her sole caregiver, but it helps to know there are others like us out there.  Maybe this site can help others and can find a way to increase awareness of these horrible organ cancers.  I hope your days ahead will bring joy and peace.

Take care,

Sherry 

 

 

Sherry I am so sorry.

I have 3 brothers but none of them were there during this last six months.  I went to my Moms every Saturday for the last 6 months.  They went 1 time each.  My Mom was holding on at the end so my brother could get there and she could tell him bye.

I watched her talk to God and her Mom and Dad who had gone on before them.  That is the gift they leave us.  Knowing that there is life on the other side.  She was a Christian so I am at peace with her passing.  However, the focus of my life for the last 6 months has been my Mom and now I am lost.  My Dad is really lost.  I try and call him several times a day.  He lives 2 1/2 hours from me.

Are you with Hospice?  They are wonderful.  My prayers are with you.  This is a very hard thing to deal with.  Watching someone you love die.  Then we are left here alone and that is a very deep pain.  I miss my Mom so much.  I miss talking to her on the phone and visiting with her.  Nothing will ever fill that void.

Let me know if you need to talk.  I will pray for you and your Mom..God Bless Eileen

Eileen,

My mom passed yesterday and we buried her today.  We are Jewish so everything happened very quickly.  After the funeral, everyone comes back to the house for a Shiva call - this goes on all week.  It is great to be around everyone but it turns into a bit pf a party and I am not ready for that yet.  I have not had time to grieve and get over my traumatic last few weeks.  I am still so angry, lonely and also feel lost.  I am glad you are finding peace in your religion and I hope your dad comes around.  I hope things can get a little easier for both of us, everyone says it will but I don't want to do anything with out my mom right now.

Still so hard to believe..

Take care,

Sherry 

 

My 85 year old father died of gallbladder ca january of 07. His gb was removed Sept of 06. No doctor would come on out and tell him for sure what his future was. He chose chemo/radiation. The chemo dr did tell him,which i think was a lie, that even though he was stage 4, if she chose not to go through chemo, the cancer would return in two months. Like it was gone or something. Yes, I too along with my husband and my poor broken down back mom, took care of him at home. Other siblings mainly stayed away. I tried getting everyone to take turns to help, but it caused a family problems, leaving me feeling like I didnt have the right to be telling them what to do. Even the subject was brought up to my dad and he got  mad at me. Told me by asking my brothers to help was worse than having a belly full of cancer!. That hurt me tremendously. Anyway, hospice came in to help, He hallucinated alot, Hollered for my mom constantly to help. Asked for us to shoot him because of the pain he was in. Eventually, I decided to have him taken back to the hospital because it became to heart wrenching for me to do this all alone and see my poor mom hobble to his bedside in pain herself. He passed with pneumonia at the hospital. I will never get the vision out of my head seeing him before he passed. I told him how I felt about him and to go ahead and go to Jesus. That mama would be taken care of . My mother is now living with me and doing ok.

It truly is hard watching someone you love slowly die before your eyes.  To watch them in pain suffering.  Hospice was really good about keeping my Mom out of pain, which meant she slept most of the time.

My Mom became really beautiful before she passed.  All wrinkles vanished and she looked young again.  I had nightmares for several weeks after she passed.  It hurts so bad to think about it.  I miss her so much.  She was only 67 and I feel so cheated.  I was busy with my own family for so many years and we had just really reconnected.  I had bought her a computer for her 50th wedding anniversary and she taught herself how to email.  She emailed me several times a day.  For some reason I saved most of them.  It is still too painful to go read them because when I do, it is like she never really left.  She would always start them..Hello Little Darling.  I don't know how long it takes before this pain stops.  I know I will see her again in Heaven soon.

Hang in there.  You did the best you could with a rough situation.  You stepped up to the plate and took on the responsibilty.  You should be proud of yourself.  You did the right thing.

Eileen