She Let Me Know

Before I begin my New Years Eve night, I can not help but to get this out. Today when I took my mom to rad ( cervical cancer stageIV) they told her not to come the rest of the week, just on Friday and also want to do a pelvic exam. This would be here last week anyway. She got weighed and she had lost another 5 lbs. She says shes eating and I do see her, but what struck my interest was her response to them telling her about more weight loss. She said I am eating it is the diease that is making me lose weight, this is what happens when people are dieing.(spelling ?) That was the first time I realized she is not fighting. She has been so quiet and doesn't talk much about anything. She said she's not depressed. For a week before she went in to the hospital and found out, she said she knew it would something like this. And she has already thought about it, enough to even take most of her money out of the bank, incase she did'nt make it out of the hospital. She knew and never said anything. Until we forced her to go to the emergency room. It is so hard for me to accept that maybe her fight is up. She has just begun. I tried to be so positive and try to even reasure that stats are not also right. They are just stats. I pray every minute for hope and for her to get strong and fight this beast. I t is to soon to give up! Anyone have any ideas of encouragement?

I just lost my daughter to cervical cancer on Nov 24th.  I pushed and pushed her to get more and more treatment.  I don't know if I was right or not.  During the last 6 months, the medical team offered another round of chemo.  She didn't want it. She had fought for almost 3 years.  She was only 28........ I had to let her go.  She needed to know I was going to be alright.  She needed to know her decision was OK.  She had taken the last round of chemo and radiation for me and her family.  I couldn't ask her to do it again.

Take your lead from your mother.  She will know when she has had enough.   Just love her. 

Meredith's Mom

 

As I sit here writing this to you.....I am waiting for news of my sister-in-law, who is in the hospital right now, undergoing surgery for Stage 3b Cervical Cancer.  She neglected to get her regular check-ups and knew somethig was wrong, yet she ignored all the signs.....she has 6 children and a loving family and now she is facing reality....CANCER.  We have no idea what the outcome will be....but we pray and we hope and we hold one another close for love and support and know that our Father in heaven is in control.

I watched both my parents die from cancer.  My mother had fought it for over 30 years and she just got tired...tired of fighting the fight and when we were still cheering for her to keep going, she was taking her coat off and sitting on the side lines.  My Dad on the other hand, fought and fought and passed away in exactly 4 weeks from hearing he had cancer.

 You have to let your Mom make the decision to fight or not fight, you can remain positive and loving, and I know she appreciates and loves you for that too.  But unless she has the drive and desire to keep fighting, it will do no good.  We are all made up so differently.  I pray that you are all comforted.

 Just be there and love your Mama!  You are in my prayers....