Mom's Cancer

I found this website a few minutes while I was looking for some kind of emotional support right now, and all those messages really got to me because I am going through a hard time.  My mom is in the hospital in ICU and getting weaker by the minute.  She was diagnosed with Ovarian cancer last September and went into treatment, was doing ok, but then had to be switched to a stronger chemo just last Monday and on Wednesday we had to call 911 because she got very sick.  I am hurting so much watching my mom lying there looking at us with a very sad face.  She looks like a little girl that needs to be protected and I can't do anything for her.   Today I am feeling worst than ever and I feel that I can't, and won't be able to handle it.  How can I or will be able to go on without my mom?  I've always been very close to my mom, even after I got married we still lived in different units, same building.  I feel like scraming and running away from it all.  I have a 8 year old daughter, but even though people tell me I need to stay strong for my daughter, I don't think I can do it.   How can I go on?  Will this pain ever go away?  If I feel like that now, I am very afraid to know what it will be like when she's gone.  I feel so lonely and lost.               

Maggs,

It's been 20 years since I lost my mom and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't talk to her. I too felt there was noway life could go on w/o her, but your know what. It does. Lean on family, friends, clergy, and nowadays we have places like this for help. She sufferred a long time with her illness and darn that was hard, so I know how you feel. But, your mom is still here. Cherish the moments, live day by day with her. Think of all the things that you want to talk to her about and do so. Just spend time with her. I realize she is suffering but they can give her medication for that will minimize the pain, but having you next to her minimizes it also. Just be there for her and you. My dad is now 87 and in very poor health, I see his day coming soon. So, I'm thinking of all the things I didn't say to mom that I'm saying to dad. I'm also doing this while at 51 years old, and a family of my own, I'm fighting tonsil cancer. So, life can be tough at times. Just hang in there, be strong. Act the way she would want you to act. Live your live in the way that makes her proud, today and forever and you'll be ok.

God bless you and your mom.

Rick

Thank you so much for your support, you are right I need to cherish every minute that she's here.   My mom is 72 years old, I am 45 and I still feel that's not enought time she's been here.    I also still have my dad he's 78 and in good health, so I should thank God for that and for all the rest of my family I still have.  

thank you again!

Maggie 

 

 

 

 

 

On 2/22/2008 maggs09 wrote:

I found this website a few minutes while I was looking for some kind of emotional support right now, and all those messages really got to me because I am going through a hard time.  My mom is in the hospital in ICU and getting weaker by the minute.  She was diagnosed with Ovarian cancer last September and went into treatment, was doing ok, but then had to be switched to a stronger chemo just last Monday and on Wednesday we had to call 911 because she got very sick.  I am hurting so much watching my mom lying there looking at us with a very sad face.  She looks like a little girl that needs to be protected and I can't do anything for her.   Today I am feeling worst than ever and I feel that I can't, and won't be able to handle it.  How can I or will be able to go on without my mom?  I've always been very close to my mom, even after I got married we still lived in different units, same building.  I feel like scraming and running away from it all.  I have a 8 year old daughter, but even though people tell me I need to stay strong for my daughter, I don't think I can do it.   How can I go on?  Will this pain ever go away?  If I feel like that now, I am very afraid to know what it will be like when she's gone.  I feel so lonely and lost.               

 

Maggs,    my heart goes out to you---It's one of the hardest things we have to do in our lives,  to watch and wait helplessy whle our loved ones pass on.....I went through this with my son, my mom and my dad.  You need to search for that inner strength...it;s hiding in all of us somewhere deep inside.  It's a time where you just need to be together , family and love.... that's what it's all about.   Yes it hurts like hell but in time you will find the light again...but you have to go through the dark first.   It's called grieving----there are no rules, you think you're going crazy but you're not.   So just let it come out , say what you need to say, love and just hang on to those dear to you as they will catch you when you fall.    All the best,  Anna

Anna,

thank you...you are right. My mom always said that God never gives us more than we can handle.   When you stop to think that you are not the only one that is going or has gone through it, it kind of gives you hope that others have been able to keep going and so will you.  You've been through a lot and are still here to help support others...thank you!