My 88 year old grandmother was just diagnosed with secondary bone cancer in her ribs and spine after a relapse of breast cancer last spring. She is much older than your father and very frail, but otherwise very alert and in decent shape for her age. The Dr.s prescribed hormone therapy only. I am her only descendant and my grandfather gets confused at times as he is 90. I am worried about the both of them because they are at home, though they have help. I am wondering if forgoing radiation/chemo is a sign that the Dr.s are just trying to manage the disease and allow her to have hopefully a few more decent years without the upheaval of radiation/ chemo. I am wondering if the decision to forgo the chemo/radiation is a sign that the Dr.s are just trying to manage the disease. Perhaps chemo radiation is a good sign meaning they think they can cure it?
My other grandmother also had spinal cancer which eventually disolved a portion of her spine and left her in incredible pain. It was terrible to watch her suffer and I wish the Dr.s would have stopped treating her and prolonging her pain. In the end, she lost touch with reality- very sad to watch.
I think there is a time to fight and time to give in. My mother has lived for 30 years with terrible pain from a car accident and managed to just watch me get married. Bone cancer can be treated and cured. However, for the very old and frail, it presents doctors and family with a difficult decision..