Nearing The End

I have found this site to be so comforting and supportive to me while going through stomach cancer with my mom.  She was dx with stage IV the end of January and put on Hospice 3 days later - no chemo/radiation/stomach removal surgery.  She was given a J-tube.  In tow months she has had the J-tube plug up so badly that it had to be replaced.  This morning she has decided to dicontinue the J-tube.  She is tired and very weak.  The doctor is saying 1-2 weeks.  Does anyone have experience with this time-line.  He is saying that because she was nurished and hydrated the end could take some time.  What is going to happen to her will she be in pain or just go to sleep?  I miss her already.  Thanks all for your input.

I am so sorry to read your latest post.  I too have been in the exact spot you are.  It was such a terrifying time that I now realize I didn't even comprehend.  I am still dealing with it to some extent 8 months later.

I hope I am not too straight forward for you.  My mother's j-tube plugged (like you mother's) and no longer worked.  My mother chose not to have an IV put in and basically only wet her lips and sucked on freezies when she could.  We too were told she could hang on for up to 2 weeks due to her age but, she only lasted a few days.  My mom's pain was controlled quite well but, the vomitting of bile was a tremendous strain on her weak mind and body.

From what I have been told everyone is different.  I truly hope for your mother to be as comfortable as possible.

I will say a little prayer for your mom and you too.  

 

Thank you for being straight with me.  Currently Mom has vertually no pain and Hospice has been keeping on top the nausea/vomiting thing.  The feeding tube was stopped yesterday and i am going up there tomorrow afternoon.  She lives 230 miles away so it only takes 3.5 hours to get there.

It has been very difficult for my brother who is in AZ and we are in MT.  We are both feeling guilty when we are home and not there and feel guilty when we are there and not home.  We both are fortunate to have wonderful employers and spouses but it has been very hard not to even mention watching our remaining parent leave us.

Enough whining about me and thank you so much again for sharing your experience.

That is good that you can go be with your mom.  I am sure she will have comfort in knowing you are close.

Don't ever think you are whining either.  If there is ever a time to stress or complain it probably would be now.   "We" on this message board all do it at times.

Take care 

Hi Rhonda,

 I am so sorry to hear about your mother, and can relate to how you are feeling. My fathers J-Tube feedings were stopped 8 days before he passed. He was not fed in hospice, and only sucked on wet sponges to wet his lips and keep his mouth moist because it was always open. My father lived for 8 days in Hospice, and only 3 of them were with him conscious. If there is anything I can do to help, answer any questions, etc, please send me a private message. Hospice is wonderful, and your mother will go peacefully, I promise.