Recently Diagnosed Spouse

My husband was recently diagnosed with ALL at the age of 32.  He has been through his first round of chemo and is doing very well so far.  He is tough, they caught it extremely early and I truly believe that he is going to get through this.  In the meantime, I'm very worried about myself.  I'm an emotional mess and every attempt I've made to try to find professional help has turned into a debacle of epic proportions. 

I'm tired and angry that my life has been completely put on hold.  I worry about him constantly and can't sleep.  Is there anyone else out there that is going through this that can relate?  My family and friends are very supportive (most of whom live far away), but if one more person tells me to be strong for him, I might have to strangle them.  I'm just looking for any advice to help me get through this so I can give him what he needs to fight this disease.

 Thanks

On 5/12/2008 AngelaH wrote:

My husband was recently diagnosed with ALL at the age of 32.  He has been through his first round of chemo and is doing very well so far.  He is tough, they caught it extremely early and I truly believe that he is going to get through this.  In the meantime, I'm very worried about myself.  I'm an emotional mess and every attempt I've made to try to find professional help has turned into a debacle of epic proportions. 

I'm tired and angry that my life has been completely put on hold.  I worry about him constantly and can't sleep.  Is there anyone else out there that is going through this that can relate?  My family and friends are very supportive (most of whom live far away), but if one more person tells me to be strong for him, I might have to strangle them.  I'm just looking for any advice to help me get through this so I can give him what he needs to fight this disease.

 Thanks

Hi Angela,

I am sorry about your husband's diagnosis.  I had the same diagnosis in Feb of 2007.  I ended up having a stem cell transplant from a donor in June of 2007 ( nearly 1 year ago).  Although I have not been a caretaker, I can tell you that I encouraged my partner (who was my caretaker) to take every spare moment to do something he enjoys.  He plays disc golf to unwind.  I encourage you to take time for yourself whenever you can grab it.  Is there a support group for caretakers in your area?  Most cancer clinics have some kind of support groups available.  Take advantage of what is available. 

I have recovered to the point where I am working full time again.  Your husband is much younger than I, so I would bet he has a good chance of full recovery.  Have faith that this will not last forever and he will get better. 

Thank you so much for your response!  It is great to hear from a survivor! 

I haven’t really looked for support groups in my area.  I’m not sure that I’m ready to go that route, but I have been seeing a therapist to help me cope. 

Can I ask you a few questions about the stem cell transplant?  When did they decide that the transplant was the best option for you?  I’m curious bc my husband is getting the results of his second bone marrow biopsy today and I’m wondering if they are going to bring up that option.  What can we expect if they do want to perform the transplant?

Thank you again for sharing your story!

On 5/19/2008 AngelaH wrote:

Thank you so much for your response!  It is great to hear from a survivor! 

 

I haven’t really looked for support groups in my area.  I’m not sure that I’m ready to go that route, but I have been seeing a therapist to help me cope. 

 

Can I ask you a few questions about the stem cell transplant?  When did they decide that the transplant was the best option for you?  I’m curious bc my husband is getting the results of his second bone marrow biopsy today and I’m wondering if they are going to bring up that option.  What can we expect if they do want to perform the transplant?

 

Thank you again for sharing your story!

 

I also sent you a private reply since I don't check this site very often.

The worst thing about a transplant is the high dose chemo and possibly radiation they give you a few days before the actual transplant.    The first few months will be the most difficult.  Mouth sores,  extreme weakness, possible nausea, daily magnesium infusions, digestion issues....  The risk of infection is very high, along with the risk of rejection (graft vs host disease) so he will have to be monitored very closely.  It will be rough, however, probably not as bad as the doctors will lead you to believe.  My docs always gave me the worst case scenario. The good thing about having a transplant is there is a good chance it could save your husbands life.