Fear Of Recheck Testing

Hi everyone. I had a partial nephrectomy (RCC) in 2006 and will be going in for my annual test in three weeks. I feel afraid. I wish I could deal with the testing & result waiting better. I'd appreciate any words of wisdom. Thanks,
Darcy

 

On 7/24/2008 Darcy r wrote:

Hi everyone. I had a partial nephrectomy (RCC) in 2006 and will be going in for my annual test in three weeks. I feel afraid. I wish I could deal with the testing & result waiting better. I'd appreciate any words of wisdom. Thanks,
Darcy

Dear Darcy,  I can so relate to your feelings of fear.  Everytime we go in to see my husband's oncologist I literally AND physically get sick to my stomach and end up with a severe headache.  But only one time did we get bad news and that was when his cancer had returned and metastisized to the bones.  We were totally taken aback and did not expect it because Tom was feeling so good.  All the other times we got ok news that he was holding steading with no new growth and some shrinkage.  I've discovered that FOR ME, it was my lack of faith in God.  But, God knows we're only human and this is such a freightening time for all of us who are faced with this awful condition.  I think for me, part of the fear is the doctor himself.  While he is great and knows what he's doing, it's that awful "dead silence" when he walks in the room and he sits there to look over the tests which he has on his computer.  I just want to scream at him sometimes and say "why in the hell don't you look over these tests BEFORE you get into the room?" But I don't. 

Just one time before I die it is my wish to put a doctor and a nurse in a small waiting room, close the door and not come in and just leave them sit there and wait and wait and wait.  Then, turn the door knob, then not go in and walk away and let them sit there and wait some more.  If they would only for once put themselves in the patient's shoes.

The only thing I can suggest is to ask God to relieve you of the fear of waiting.  It may take time, but if you keep asking, you shall receive.  I'm sure of it.  I hope this helps.

Kathy

 

On 7/24/2008 chef4u wrote:

 

On 7/24/2008 Darcy r wrote:

Hi everyone. I had a partial nephrectomy (RCC) in 2006 and will be going in for my annual test in three weeks. I feel afraid. I wish I could deal with the testing & result waiting better. I'd appreciate any words of wisdom. Thanks,
Darcy

Dear Darcy,  I can so relate to your feelings of fear.  Everytime we go in to see my husband's oncologist I literally AND physically get sick to my stomach and end up with a severe headache.  But only one time did we get bad news and that was when his cancer had returned and metastisized to the bones.  We were totally taken aback and did not expect it because Tom was feeling so good.  All the other times we got ok news that he was holding steading with no new growth and some shrinkage.  I've discovered that FOR ME, it was my lack of faith in God.  But, God knows we're only human and this is such a freightening time for all of us who are faced with this awful condition.  I think for me, part of the fear is the doctor himself.  While he is great and knows what he's doing, it's that awful "dead silence" when he walks in the room and he sits there to look over the tests which he has on his computer.  I just want to scream at him sometimes and say "why in the hell don't you look over these tests BEFORE you get into the room?" But I don't. 

Just one time before I die it is my wish to put a doctor and a nurse in a small waiting room, close the door and not come in and just leave them sit there and wait and wait and wait.  Then, turn the door knob, then not go in and walk away and let them sit there and wait some more.  If they would only for once put themselves in the patient's shoes.

The only thing I can suggest is to ask God to relieve you of the fear of waiting.  It may take time, but if you keep asking, you shall receive.  I'm sure of it.  I hope this helps.

Kathy

 

Thank you Kathy! You understand and you're right. I do need to become closer with my faith. I appreciate your sharing and I wish the best for your husband. Darcy

 

On 7/24/2008 Darcy r wrote:

Hi everyone. I had a partial nephrectomy (RCC) in 2006 and will be going in for my annual test in three weeks. I feel afraid. I wish I could deal with the testing & result waiting better. I'd appreciate any words of wisdom. Thanks,
Darcy

Hi,

I, too, have had lots of waiting for news that could change my life.  First, Let Go and Let God.  I also pray a lot and ask my friends to do the same.  Don't waste the positive energy on things that there's not a thing you can do about at the moment.  Rather, think lots and lots of positive thoughts or envision yourself in a place that brings you calm and comfort.

Meanwhile, I will offer up prayers for you for lots and lots of positive results.

God's peace,

Lisa 

 

I've picked up yet another new term along the way to describe 'fear of recheck testing' - Scanxiety. Seems to fit the bill.

One way I cope is to think - look the actual scan has been DONE. Nothing is going to change in the time between the scan a couple of days ago and now. The only thing that WILL change is our knowledge. (But that's a big 'only'!)

I agree - staying calm, composed, meditative, and above all, quietly prayerful, is perhaps the best way to get through scanxiety. And I hope I can apply it to myself in three months time when we get to find out whether the Sutent is working on my husband......

All the very best,as ever, to all of us - Julie.

Thank you Lisa. I'm embarrassed to say this but I've had moments of being mad at God. I know thats not right and so babyish. This whole journey has made me finally wake-up to life. I appreciate everything now. What I'm realizing is that I do need to reconnect with my faith. Again....thank you. Darcy

Hi - I have been through the waiting for scan results many times along with the visits to the Oncologist while getting infused with 5fu.  I have waited for the surgeons to walk thru during rounds to give me whatever results they had from the surgery.  I have also waited for lab tests to check the CEA level, etc, etc.  It has been a long three years and I am cancer freeee at this point.  I realized after the 1st year that acceptance was the key.  I needed to accept WHATEVER the outcome was to be.  I prayed, along with my family, and made my peace with God.  Don't get me wrong - I want to stick around a long time beyond my 71 years but that may not be God's will.  the problem was not the colon cancer or the Doc or anything else.  It was me.  You know, WHY ME, THIS ISN"T FAIR, etc.. etc.  Once I put it in God's hands and left it there, life has been better. We live as normal a life as possible without all the ups and downs and I want to keep it that way.  Good Luck and God Bless  

Thank you Arnold......thats exactly what I need to do. I appreciate your kind words. You understand. best to you, Darcy

Hi Darcy'

I have read the responses to your post...I know it should not be a surprise so many feel the same..including me..It seems we are always waiting..for test results.since my husband was diagnoses with kidney cancer in Dec 07.Dr opinions..yet another scan...I started out saying "when this one is over it will be OK" Now I Ok just another one.... Your post brought a lot of good advice please know all those answers helped me too. David has a urologist appt today 900am ..so we wait and pray.

Best to you all...we should all find only good results

Sandy

 

 

 

Given the all-round awfulness of this disease, I think it's essential that we don't 'waste time' worrying about Scanxiety. I know it's easier said than done (!) but since we are now living 'from scan to scan' it's vital, I think, to really enjoy to the max those 'inter-scan periods'.

Yes, we each and every one of us, caregiver or patient or relative, all desperately want and hope and pray that 'one fine day' a doc will turn round to us and say 'You're cured - you can have your old life back now' - and yes, maybe, maybe that fantastic day WILL come, but in the meantime, what we have now is so very precious, and we mustn't let fears of the future - including scans to come! - poison this time for us.

Didn't good old Scarlett O Hara say something very wise, along the lines of 'I won't worry about it today, I'll worry about it tomorrow' - every day! And boy, was she a survivor if ever there was one!  

 Julie (enjoying a beautiful sunny English summer's day - and we don't always get those in the UK!!!)