Stage Iv Lung Cancer Mets To Brain

I am new here but just wanted to see if anyone else has a similar situation. May husband was diagnosed in May 05. He has lung cancer in his rt lung which met to his brain and to both adrenal glands. He had caniotomy which removed the brain tumor and has just finished 15 sessions of whole brain radiation. He also completed lung radiation. He is now just taking chemo once a week. The doctors continue to tell him that he is doing great and they did not expect him to do this well. Because of this, he believes he is being cured by his treatment and that everything will be ok. It is difficult for me because he refuses to discuss getting anything in order "just in case". He is 50yr, with non-small cell adenocarcinoma lung cancer. Can anyone give me any ideas as to what to expect, is there a cure for Stage iv and what is the life expectancy. The drs are not saying anything.

Please help.

Laura

Tough questions since people handle cancer in different ways, I am glad to hear he is doing better than expected, my wife has the same thing although her cancer in the brain was dealt with by raditation and her cancer is around the heart, on the lung and now recently on her adrenal gland, we are well into the 2nd year of treatments, the dr's let me know upfront that the most time she has is 3 years, and she is just 42 yrs old, she is also stage 4 nsclc ( non small cell lung cancer) we are now in our 4th different treatment, I really feel it is a hit or miss thing with the treatments, just one more thing, dr's go by the body but ultimately it is God who contrls the soul and has final say so, we are very much in the understanding that miricales happen every day. Getting both of you affairs in order is always a good thing to do no matter what, this has allowed me to know what to do if she doesnt survive her cancer and a blessing to know her funeral will be done in a way she approves of, make no bones about it, I want her with me for another 18 yrs or more, however one fact remains from birth we are on a journey to death( or rebirth into his grace) this vessel( our body)will not last forever. you will be in our prayers. Hope this helps Tony

Hi, I'm new here too but maybe we can help each other. My husband was diagnosed Oct. 04, with lung cancer, surgery 11/4 to remove top 2 lobes of rt. lung, chemo for 6 weeks. They told him he was fine, they got it all. April 05 he started feeling bad and developed a cough. The Dr. treated it as an allergy (with his background, this makes sense). May 05 he collapsed on the golf course and rushed to hosp. His rt. lung had collapsed and another tumor was found, also two more tumors in left lung, four in the brain, lesions one his shoulder, spleen and liver. They suspected it was spreading at the time of surgery. He had full radiation on his brain, shoulder and lung for 21 straight days and is finishing a once a week for two weeks and off a week (5 sessions in all) of Gemzar chemo. I see him getting worse each day. The radiologist told me(not my husband) 2 months ago to get everything in order. She said it was a 6 mos. to a year window but she felt he might not make the 6 mos. He goes for a CAT scan on 9/6 and I hope the Dr. does not offer more chemo options. My husband has not talked about anything either. We went to see a Pallative Counselor that almost painted the real picture but he still seems to be in denial. I know how you feel and I've tried to do all that I can to get things in order, but would really like to be able to talk with him about it. It's very hard! We've been married 45 years. He's never been a big 'talker' on issues. It does, however, sound as though your husband's cancer has not spread as extensively as mine, so maybe there is more hope. Please keep me posted. Your new friend, Pag

Hi Tony, I'm so sorry about your wife and was inspired by your message. My husband and I have been married 45 years and he is going into his 'final days'. Since he has not mentioned getting anything in order and/or his funeral requests(we already have everything purchased) such as songs, palbearers, etc., I feel as though if I mention it, he will think I've given up hope. We have a strong belief in God and a wonderful Church family and study the Bible. We know there are worse things than death and heaven is waiting. I am, however, afraid to ask him what he wants at his funeral? How did you approach that? Pag

Dear Laura,

My heart goes out to you for what you are going through and will go through. I lost my mom amd her brother to nonsmall cell lung cancer eleven months apart. Both were diagnosed at Stage IV. My mom had mets to the bones and to the adrenal glands and died six months to the day finding out about her diagnosis. My uncle had brain and bone mets and died 16 months later. Lung cancer is the deadliest cancer and we need to educate ourselves about it. Maybe with Peter Jennings and Dana Reeve's more will be available for lung cancer patients and their caregivers. Please find the support you need from the loved one's around you. Educate yourself, because I found the Drs. didn't do too good of a job. Feel free to contact me if you would like more information

God Bless,
Pam

Pag,
Thanks for the nice reply, as far as approaching your husband on final wishes, the least I can say is timing is probably important, maybe get your pastor involved and have him over for a visit and let him start the discussion, maybe coming from your pastor your husband wont feel so threaten or so removed from the idea of getting his affairs in order, the way I approached it was to ask my wife directly with a whoooole lot of subtleness. hope this helps, Tony

My sister was also diagnosed with Stage 4 20 months ago. She refused the surgies urged by her doctors. She has refused any Chemo. She only will allow a radiation therapy called Novalis which has little or no side effects. Although she started with a tumor in her lung ..it has spread to her heart, bones, liver and brain. But I have got to tell you...she does not think she is dying and that is that. Her weight is good and she continues every day to search our natural ways to cure the cancer. The radiated 3 tumors in her brain last week. Will she surive? Not sure. The odds say no. Her doctor said without any aggressive treatment 9 more months. That would be in line with what the first doctor said when she refused surgery. But for now she is happy. She will not think of dying. She always thinks of this as a cure. New spots are small spots. You know I am not sure if that is wrong. GOD will decide when you are to go home. All the medical nonsense in the world can't stop that. Should she live sick? Should she live as if she is dying? I am on her all of the time. Get your affairs in order..do this...you should do that. I can't print what she tells me to do. But GOD BLESS her. If she lives 9 months or 90 years she did it her way. She was never sick. She feels the mind controls a great deal. In the end it is her body, her life and her cancer. I can only support and love her now and value every minute I have with her. If it is only for 9 minutes, 9 days or 9 years. I hope and pray for you, your husband and family. This is hard. Until I responded to you..I really never admitted I have to allow her to think the way she wants. Thank you for helping me. May GOD bless you.

Thank you Tony for responding. I hope that your wife is doing well. We celebrated our 19th wedding anniversary yesterday and it was great to see him in such high spirits. It is difficult to think that he may not be here for the 20th. He had his PET scan yesterday so we are just waiting to hear what the result are. It is so scary not knowing what to expect from one day to another. I am just grateful that the cancer has not taken its toll on him, as of yet. The radiation to the head was hard on him but luckily it was only 15 treatments. Not sure what the long term effects might be. It has effected his short term memory though. He also lost all hair due to the radiation. I will keep you posted on the PET results. I will pray for you and your wife. Trust in God for he is always with his children.

Laura

I am so sorry to hear about your mother and your ucle. I can only imagine how difficult is must be. Know that they are in a beautiful place. Did your mother have any treatments such as chemo or radiation? It is just so confusing for me because one would think that the drs would be giving us more information. The more research I do about stage iv lung cancer, the more I read that there is no cure. Most of the time frames I have read say the patient normally has anywhere from 6 months to 1 years. They will not remove the lung since they say the cancer is too extensive. I have read where people have had their lung removed if there were limited aread affected. I guess since both his adrenal glands are affected this is not an option for him. Many people who have had brain radiation say that this treatment really doesn't help too much because most of the time the cancer comes back but in a different location withing the brain. Also, if only one adrenal gland were effected then perhaps they would have removed it. It is just so much to take in. It has been a little over 3 months since the DX and I just don't know what to expect. We have been married for 19 years (anniversary yesterday) and I am not sure what i will do if he were not here. Thank you for taking the time to write. Please give me any information you may have. Thank you again. laura

Hi Pag,
I am sorry to hear how hard the cancer has been on your husband and how hard it is on you. My husband too is not really a big talker. He has always taken care of everything and now I feel so overwhelmed at the idea of having to take care of everything. He tells me that he does not want me to worry about anything. That there is nothing I can do to change anything. I figure he is waiting to see how his PET scan comes out and then perhaps he will decide what he needs to do at that point. We have been married for 19 years. He is 12 years older than me so I have always looked to him for support and guidance. Now, it looks like it may be the other way around and I am really scared. The possibility that he may not be here much past 6 months - 1 year is overwhelming to me and I just don't know what to do. I can only be there for him and help him through this the best I can. I find that I am now the support and guidance for him and it really feels different for me. He tells me that everything is going to be ok because he is being cured and he is going to be ok. This is just the opposite of what I have read and what others have told me. I can't address it with him because then it looks as though I have lost hope. I haven't. I am just trying to accept a possible reality so that if it does happen, I will not break down completely. I am so confused at this point. I dropped out of college so that I could be with him as much as poosible. Take care and I hope to hear from you. laura