Hi!
I had my esophagectomy 19 months ago, at 10 months post-op I had very much struggle every day. I too was a slow healer. Does your husband have a jejunostomy feeding tube? Sounds like he might need some support with his calories. I had to keep my tube for 9 months after surgery. I lost weight after removing it and had to go to the hospital a couple of times to get calories directly in the blood stream. I still struggle a lot to keep my weight up, since dumping problems are quite an issue. I too react to milk products now, but I just can't leave it alone... I love milk! I'm trying to put it out of my diet...
I just recently discovered that soft, well ripened pears do good! My digestive system doesn't get upset at all when I eat pears. Hard to live on pears alone, though...
About vomiting... I still throw up a little every other day, mainly in the mornings, after breakfast. I'm trying all the time to change this by diet, but it's hard to find the exact right diet. It's different for each person, you have to try different things.
Diarreas... Yes, had that too, and still have, but much less frequent now! At 10 months post-op it was probably 3-4 days/week, now about 1 time/week.
Also it's hard to get any appetite when dealing with dumping symptoms, but you have to try different foods anyway. In most cases, I believe things will stabilize, and the body will adjust, even if it takes years. Some symptoms might remain, though. Anyhow I believe it's important to get some help with the calories, so he doesn't get too weak. If you're too weak it's even harder to eat.
Wish you the best!