Hi Joan,
There are hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of women who have really bad side effects with the anti-estrogen drugs. They induce an especially severe chemical menopause (above and beyond normal menopause) that can really play havoc with the body's immune, nervous and joint systems. And no, it doesn't seem like most of the drs have any idea just how excruciating ill these drugs can make a person.
Yes, there are women who have stopped taking these medicines and have recovered from their pain and symptoms. sometimes it takes a while, but is possible. And there are women who have stopped taking them and have become cancer free, or at least in remission. It takes determination and persistence, but is possible.
My recommendation is to find a naturopathic practitioner (whether it be a dr, a nutritionist, an herbalist, a homeopath or practice of ayurvedic or traditional chinese medicine) and work with them to construct a natural regimen that will limit your body's access to cancer-feeding estrogen while continuing to meet the hormonal needs of your body's many systems.
Feel free to take a look at what I did when I was diagnosed with highly estrogen-receptor positive metastatic breast cancer and could not tolerate the anti-estrogen drugs. My regimen is not a guaranteed answer for anyone else, but you can get a great idea of things you can start doing to decrease your estradial level while simultaneously providing the nutrients your body needs. Many elements of my regimen factor in the need to treat fibromyalgia and arthritis - so there are supplements in it that should help to relieve your bone pain, also.
my story
http://motherearthtreasurechest.blogspot.com/2008/08/my-stor
my regimen
http://motherearthtreasurechest.blogspot.com/2008/09/my-pers
Wishing you the best of luck and health,
Tre