Hi...i'm new to this. My family just lost the love of our lives. She was our beautiful, one week shy of 13, golden retriever. Gentle and full of love. A real princess. On may 19 this seemingly healthy gal went out for a pee and peed blood with awful clots. Took her to the vet...Xrays showed a tumour on neck of bladder, but unfortunately further rads showed huge mets to the lungs. She was basically filled with cancer. In the end, after entertaining several strategies, and starting peroxicam for a few days, they felt she would not make it through the weekend. Crazy thing is that she didn't act sick. She ran, played, ate, did all the things she loved, but somewhere she was bleeding out as her mucous membranes got very pale and she began to get weak. Earlier, there was the possiblity of debulking the bladder tumor, but the latest rads made it all look pretty iffy. At the very best, if she got through the surgery.....it would come back....and there was all that other cancer too. It was a terrible shock, and for the first time i decided no surgery, no further attempts to prolong life for..what...2 months? two months of most likely poor quality life with pain. At this time she seemed to have no pain and still seemed happy. Apparently, this is the way you want to remember them....not in pain and on their last legs. after much discussion and tears with our beloved vet, we decided to let her go on the weekend. we had 2 fabulous days with her. she went swimming!...had a great walk. next day, pancakes for breakfast, treats, icecream and a steak! the whole family was with her and we tried to stay happy for her so she didn;t pick up on our sadness as she was very tuned into our feelings. We said goodbye to our beautiful girl on 3pm sat may 23, and i am slowly making the big adjustment. I still hear her bark, i think i see her in the backyard, i'm expecting her at the door when i come home and so on.....i imagine this will go on for some time. At first i was thinking, "who am i to make that decision for her???" But everyone, even my kids said "mom, she really is sick...she looks sick....you are being brave and doing her a huge kindness; sparing her the indignity of of being ill". So bravely i marched on. She was, after all almost 91 years old! I wondered how i could have missed all the craziness inside her, but my vet said not to beat myself up over it. Amber just always looked happy; Goldens are terribly stoic and just don;t show pain. I really don;t think she HAD pain to be honest. BUT, she had the potential to bleed out over th weekend....and then what? A trip to the emergency vet, and having to put her to sleep under ugly circumstances. Yes, this option we chose was hard, but not as traumatizing as the other scenario would have been.
At any rate...i never thought i'd be writing this on the internet....but here it is; my story. I am proud to say that she had a great life. She was loved tremendously, she loved tremendously, and in the end i have to think i did her the favour i owed her. I said goodbye to my fourth child...the cute one with the furry tail as i used to say with a laugh to my friends.