I am so sad my Mom has lung cancer

My Mom has been diagnosed with squamous cell non-small lung cancer.  We thought she had one 4.2cm tumor in the LLL but after the PET scan, it revealed a 0.9cm tumor in the LUL and her parotid gland (where you get the mumps) lit up.  The doc stabbed her neck with a needle...groooossss..and oucccchhhh!!!  We find out tomorrow if it is malignant.  she is to have a PICC port put in and start her txol/carboplatin chemo soon and perhaps radiation therapy.  We talk to the Rad Doc 2morrow.  It was not a good thing but I watched a vid on you tube about a man that passed away from lung cancer and it was so sad, his daughter posted it as a memorial and I balled my eyes out!!  I have very high hopes she will do well.  Is there anyoun out there that has had this tyoe of cancer as a stage IIB ?  That is I think what stage she is in.  I have no support as she has always been my strength.  I have a handicapped daughter that has had 14 surgeries and it has kept me a bit housebound so I do not know many people around here but my Mom.  I am really afraid and do not want to see her suffer.  I really would like to hear some experiences...good and bad!!  I have to hear both sides.  Wouldn't it be great if there were no bad experiences!!!  This message board is now my source of support and I hope to meet some really noice people!!  Thanks!!

Hi there,

My name is Stacy. My father's just been dxed with Lung CA as well. They found out he had a 3.7cm in his LLL. He had his first chemo last Monday (carboplatin, alimta, avista, taxotere), but he did very well. 2 days ago, his oncologist told me that his cancer is very rare (sarcomatoid carcinoma) and very hard to treat. So I am planning to take my father to City of Hope where cancer is their specialty. Best of luck. Stacy

My mom just recently got diagnosed in 2/09 with Stage IV NSCLC and she is being treated at MD Anderson in Houston. They are great there and they started my mother on a new research drug called Dasanitib and it is working. It is keeping the cancer stable and she doesn't have to go through the IV Chemo for now. It does have a few side effects but seem are more managable then if she would have had the IV chemo. Is there any reason why they can not do surgery if it is still in the earlier stages? Best of luck

GOD Bless

- Missy

 

My husband has stage IIIB lung cancer.   He has a form of lung cancer called neuroendocrine, which is rare and fast growing.  He has been fighting this battle since October, 2008.  He has had 6 chemo treatments and 37 radiation treatments.  When diagnosed he had 5 tumors.  At first the chemo was successful in shrinking the tumors.  Then unfortunately the chemo stopped working after 4 chemo treatments and the tumors started to grow again. The radiation did not help the tumors have continued to grow (the radiation may have slowed the grow) and now there is a new tumor near his heart.  

Everyone is different and reacts differently to treatment.  After his 2nd chemo treatment he started losing his hair and getting sick.  He continued to be sick.  In his case radiation has been just as hard on him as the chemo.  Now that everything is out of his system his hair is growing back and he is feeling alot better.  He has more engery and is able to get up and do things.  He did lose about 25 pounds so far. 

Dealing with chemo is very frustrating and dealing with the doctors is also frustrating.  I really like my husbands doctors but there are times I felt frustrated because I didn't think she was giving us enough information.  My husband has ADD and he doesn't have any questions.  He is ok with knowing the minimum.  I on the other hand am the opposite and of coarse the doctor's respond to his type of personnality.  His doctor did say to me once,  there will come a time when I have to be more firm with him and until then she was going to let him have his denial.  Unfortunately, this week I noticed a big change in her manner in what she said and how she said it.  Which just confirmed to me how serious his condition has gotten.

 The whole cancer process no matter what the outcome is can be very frustrating and draining. Remember you have to make time for yourself.  It is just as important for you to take time for yourself.  You already have a full plate and you need to take time to relax and focus on yourself, even if it is just a few minutes a day. 

 I pray that God will guide you and give you the strength and grace to get through this difficult time.  

 kzfaimly 

      

Hi,

I am so sorry to hear about what you and your family are going through. My mom was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer in Sep '07 and has been on a number of treatments since then.

When she was first diagnosed after months of coughing (her doctor diagnosed her late, her CT scans were not read properly, a whole bunch of should have would have could haves a go), her general physician told me to take things one day at a time, I was so pissed!! thinking what is this guy thinking and ....

Anyways, I have learned that we must educate ourselves, my mom at times is so tired because of the treatments that she doesn't have the energy to do it. So my brother and I do the research and we talk to the doctor when she doesn't feel like it.

One thing is for certain, there are so many drugs out there and so many clinical trials, that you really should hope for the best and do as much as you can. We have this one life to live and it is precious.

The other thing is that one can really take things one day at a time and enjoy the time we have now. I don't mean go out and party yourself to death, but really to enjoy the time you spend with your mother.

Your mom will be tired  and fatigued because of the chemo, make sure she eats well and properly. You can talk to nutritionists or especialists that can help you with supplements and diets if you wish. Integrative medicine doctors have been quite helpful with us reducing the side effects of chemo. Although they may not say it, the patients undergoing chemotherapy really appreciate and can use help with shopping, food preparation, running errands, even small things and helping around the house.

Make sure that you/your mom will question the doctor on the options they put on the table for you, doublecheck any test results, etc.

Have hope, I wish you and your family the best and a lot of love and energy for your mom.

Bests,

FOM

I am so sorry that you and your mother have to go through this terrible thing.  My father had nsclc stage 4 when they found it.  He passed away in april 09 after fighting it for almost 2 years.  I must tell you that you need to be her advocate to find out everything you need to know about this cancer.  Go to a specialized hospital to be treated, as they have so much more information and treatments out there.  I was so disappointed in the treatment my father got.   It was pretty standard.  I tried to get him to go to special hosp, but he elected not to go.  (It was several hours away from home)  Now I wish I had insisted on it.  Follow your heart and do what you think is the right thing.

 

 

On 6/19/2009 Hoi An wrote:

Hi there,

My name is Stacy. My father's just been dxed with Lung CA as well. They found out he had a 3.7cm in his LLL. He had his first chemo last Monday (carboplatin, alimta, avista, taxotere), but he did very well. 2 days ago, his oncologist told me that his cancer is very rare (sarcomatoid carcinoma) and very hard to treat. So I am planning to take my father to City of Hope where cancer is their specialty. Best of luck. Stacy

Hi Stacy,

I am very sorry to hear about your Dad, that makes me sad too!!  My Mom wanted to go to Sloan-Kettering, they are very good fighting the cancer.  On their web site there is a host of information, maybe you could find more info on their site.  The tumor in my mom's neck turned out to be benign, too bad the other tumors in her lung are cancerous.  I hope your Dad does well, I will keep you , your Dad and your family in my prayers!!

Heather

 

On 6/19/2009 Hoi An wrote:

Hi there,

My name is Stacy. My father's just been dxed with Lung CA as well. They found out he had a 3.7cm in his LLL. He had his first chemo last Monday (carboplatin, alimta, avista, taxotere), but he did very well. 2 days ago, his oncologist told me that his cancer is very rare (sarcomatoid carcinoma) and very hard to treat. So I am planning to take my father to City of Hope where cancer is their specialty. Best of luck. Stacy

Hi Stacy,

I am very sorry to hear about your Dad, that makes me sad too!!  My Mom wanted to go to Sloan-Kettering, they are very good fighting the cancer.  On their web site there is a host of information, maybe you could find more info on their site.  The tumor in my mom's neck turned out to be benign, too bad the other tumors in her lung are cancerous.  I hope your Dad does well, I will keep you , your Dad and your family in my prayers!!

Heather

 

On 6/25/2009 tangerine wrote:

I am so sorry that you and your mother have to go through this terrible thing.  My father had nsclc stage 4 when they found it.  He passed away in april 09 after fighting it for almost 2 years.  I must tell you that you need to be her advocate to find out everything you need to know about this cancer.  Go to a specialized hospital to be treated, as they have so much more information and treatments out there.  I was so disappointed in the treatment my father got.   It was pretty standard.  I tried to get him to go to special hosp, but he elected not to go.  (It was several hours away from home)  Now I wish I had insisted on it.  Follow your heart and do what you think is the right thing.

 

Hi Tangerine,

 

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss.  It is so hard to lose a parent.  In 1998 I did CPR on my Dad and unfortunately he passed on, I miss him as I am sure that you miss yours as well.  Thankyou for taking the time and sharing your experience with me.  Sometimes experience is not always the most preasureable way to learn.  I hope that he did not suffer, I do not think I could bear to see my Mom suffer.  I am an advocate.  There are a lot of Docs that hate me from my daughter having 14 surgeries.  I wist you found happiness and through your Dad I have been given some very sound advice.  It is nice to see he did not pass in vain  Thank you so much!!

 

Heather

 

On 6/24/2009 ForOurMom wrote:

Hi,

I am so sorry to hear about what you and your family are going through. My mom was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer in Sep '07 and has been on a number of treatments since then.

When she was first diagnosed after months of coughing (her doctor diagnosed her late, her CT scans were not read properly, a whole bunch of should have would have could haves a go), her general physician told me to take things one day at a time, I was so pissed!! thinking what is this guy thinking and ....

Anyways, I have learned that we must educate ourselves, my mom at times is so tired because of the treatments that she doesn't have the energy to do it. So my brother and I do the research and we talk to the doctor when she doesn't feel like it.

One thing is for certain, there are so many drugs out there and so many clinical trials, that you really should hope for the best and do as much as you can. We have this one life to live and it is precious.

The other thing is that one can really take things one day at a time and enjoy the time we have now. I don't mean go out and party yourself to death, but really to enjoy the time you spend with your mother.

Your mom will be tired  and fatigued because of the chemo, make sure she eats well and properly. You can talk to nutritionists or especialists that can help you with supplements and diets if you wish. Integrative medicine doctors have been quite helpful with us reducing the side effects of chemo. Although they may not say it, the patients undergoing chemotherapy really appreciate and can use help with shopping, food preparation, running errands, even small things and helping around the house.

Make sure that you/your mom will question the doctor on the options they put on the table for you, doublecheck any test results, etc.

Have hope, I wish you and your family the best and a lot of love and energy for your mom.

Bests,

FOM

Hi FOM,

 

I would be FURIOUS woth those Docs.  They do not have a clue, it isn't their parent!!  I feel they are the hired help and do not have any more special education in predicting an expiration date any more than I do.

I try to help my Mom as much as possible.  It is rough, my brother and my sister hate me and want to fight when I am around.  As if this helps Mmy Mom.  How is your Mom doing now?  I hope that she is getting better.  Did she participate in the trial?  How did it do?  My Mom has asked me about them but we hae not crossed that bridge.

I wish peace and love to you and your family and thank you for the encouragement!!

Heather