When was your husband diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer? Maybe this is a brand new diagnosis and he unaware of all the advances made in recent years. Maybe read the stories here -- cptmac and Barb & Robs, and my own stories about my cousin and husband. And you'll see that there are survivors of this terrible disease. Yes, it is your husband's fight. And yes, he may just decline to fight it. I'm not God and neither are the doctors, and so it would be imprudent of either myself or the doctors (any doctor) to give you a hard and fast "time line" of how much time your dear husband to expect.
Relay this message to him. My husband was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer in March 2009. The doctors told him he had only 3-6 months to live, because he had inoperable mets to his retroperitoneam. Liver met, while clearly not very good and nobody wants them, are generally easier to deal with than anything to do with the peritoneal cavity. But oddly enough, after surgery, my husband's CEA rate was only point six. And now he's gone for two PET/CT scans -- 3 months apart -- and both are showing no evidence of disease. Will he be one of the growing number of Stage IV colon cancer survivors? Be aware that Stage IV colon cancer five year survivorship for those diagnosed in 2004 now stands at 30%. These are folks like your husband with advanced metastatic disease. Before it was a dismal 8%.... now it's officially 30% ... and these five years survivor statistics DO NOT include folks diagnosed today in 2009. There have been many new advances in chemotherapies and treatments (i.e., cyber knife, heated chemo etc.). Maybe you can convince your husband to read this and other posts from people like us.
Here's what kept my husband optimistic and thinking from the start that he can really beat this disease -- or at least give a good run for his money! My cousin was told to go home, write his will, get his personal affairs in order because he had advanced rectal cancer that had spread to his liver and lungs. He did this, but I remember visiting him in hospital and he said, he did not think it was his time. After surgery he went home, did the chemo (Xeloda) and the radiation, and his wife became the ultimate health food nazi. She took care of him and let him focus in on himself. The tumors shrank to the point were they could be ressected --- and this is long before cyber-knife surgical techniques. Then he was pretty good for a while - say about a year, then his CEA rates creeped back up. Then he discovered he had a met on his tailbone. They took his tailbone and again, he underwent chemo and radiation. He lived on the couch and watched hockey games all day -- or else slept. He got really skinny ... but he was living past the doctor's original prediction of only 3 to 6 months. For several years, he underwent chemo on and off, and go figure after about four years of this... his PET scans started coming back, showing "no evidence of disease" -- or NED in the language of cancer. Today, 17 years later, my cousin is a stage 4 colorectal cancer survivor. He is now 66, and has recently even outlived the doctor who originally gave him the dire prognosis of only 3 to 6 months tops.
cptmac is a survivor. Read his stories. You may find that clinical trials are the way to go. It certainly helped cptmac! Then there is Barb and Rob, who are fighting the big fight together as a team. I'm fighting this with my husband too.
Sure it's only been 5 months since my husbands diagnosis and surgery to remove 2 parts of his colon. The surgeon could not remove all the cancer, however, because his peritoneum was speckled with confetti like tumors. But somehow, these tumors have died or at least, they are being kept at bay by the chemo he's been undergoing . Strangely enough, he's gaining weight, getting his appetite back (even though he's on chemo) and he's walking and talking and today was his very first day back at work (light duty) at a job he loves. He does not need to work - this is not a nose-to-the-grindstone decision on his part. He just likes his job and the camaraderie of his colleagues. He got home a few hours ago after putting in a light day totaling 5 hours. He first started rooting around for food, said he was hungry. We had lunch. Then he started working on his car. Now he's downtown picking up parts at Auto Zone. And said to me before he left for downtown, that he'd like to maybe go see the new Nicolas Cage movie -- if he's up to it. If he is up to it ... gee whiz, this is the lifestyle of a man with "terminal" cancer who was only given 3-6 months to live. It's been five months now and holy hot tamales, he does not look anywhere close to death to me.
Yes, cancer can and does take lives. But it oftentimes does not. But please encourage your husband to fight it, as he's likely labouring under false impressions of the outcomes based on outdated statistics. As my husband's oncologist said to him -- after the surgeon gave him 3-6 months tops to live -- take one day at a time. And that in his practice, he's seeing more and more supposedly "terminal" cancer patients live much longer than anytime previously. I hope my husband Fuzzy will be one of them. And I hope you can encourage your husband to at least try. At minimum, he can receive paliative care chemotherapies to help slow the cancer and lessen his pain. And if he's lucky -- and responds well the the chemo just as my husband is responding well... he might be able to kick cancer in the butt. Just remember, Lance Armstong was once terminal, and he went on to win how many Tour d Frances?
Paula Jean