Colorectal surgery Monday-Pls help!

I have surgery Monday and today I am losing it.  I am so scared. I have colorectal cancer, was considered stage 4 before radiation which shrunk it considerably per surgeon, I had 6 weeks with Rad/Chemo.  I have been doing ok off and on with a few breakdowns but today ...... I am so lost and scared.  I don't want to hurt anymore. 

The cancer is close to the rectum. 5 cm in. They will try their best to re-connect.  There will enter thru lower stomach and then re-connect and then check for leaks, performed thru bottom opening.GADS!

See Severe joint pain and neurophy.  Today my anxiety is sky high and I have some discomfort in my chest.  I just need to cry and vent. I know there are thousands upon thousands who have gone through this but when it is you (me) Well you knonw what I mean, even my hot flashes are more intense, or seems so. I think I might die.  Does everyone go thru this?

Please help!

Peggy

Sorry you have to face this, but keep calm and try to look at this as I have to do this and I will be positive about what is going on.   Try to relax, take a deep breath and regain your thoughts.   Now your going through the surgery, then your going to recoupe and then you try to eat well no Sugar, fresh fruits lots and lots of veggies, and get up and move as much as you can even if just walking around your house or apt.   Then you will See your Dr. and they will get you on program  and you will follow it  You will fight it all the time and we here at comp[ass will listen to you anytime ,  I will pray for you  to come through this,.  My husband had the surgery and he did just fine,  I'm sure you will too.   Take care and don't for get to fight it .,  Bless you

I can sympathize with your anxiety.  I was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer in October of 2004.  While undergoing the colon surgery to remove the cancer the surgeon discovered it has metastasized to my liver.  Following colon surgery I had months of chemotherapy until such time as the 4 liver mets had diminished enough in size that I became a candidate for a  liver resection.  Following the liver resection, I had eight more rounds of chemo.  I was cancer free for nearly two years and then in November of 2007 it was discovered that I had mets to the lung.  I immediately started on chemo again and have remained on a variety of chemo drugs since that time.  Most recently, I underwent stereotactic radiation therapy for the one remaining spot in my lung.

 

  I was terrified initially and have since worked at thinking of my condition as a “chronic treatable disease.”  Please let your doctor’s know that you are extremely anxious and know there are truly thousands of people who live with this disease. Please think of your upcoming surgery as a positive step toward recovery.  I have learned that Life’s problems are no match for the will of the human spirit.  “Throw back the shoulders, let the heart sing, let the eyes flash, let the mind be lifted up, look upward and say to yourself... Nothing is impossible!"

Quote by ~ Norman Vincent Peale

 

Hi Nina,

I have just read your comforting message to Peggy and I must say I was very impressed with your words.  You seem to have a way about you that is both calming and comforting.  Are you a nurse or one of the other helping professions?  I felt better after reading your message and I'm not even ill.

Good job; keep visiting this board because all here need good folks such as yourself.

Godspeed.

Joan L

Oh, CAPeggy, it sounds from your words like you are very anxious and your body is reacting in a way you cannot control. That is something that happens to so many people during stressful situations.  My husband was diagnosed with Stage IV liver cancer  last June and given less than 30 days to live.  I remember thinking that I would not be breathing if it were not voluntary, my mind was just not capable of functioning in it's usual fashion and breathing was most difficult.  My body ached all over and I could not sleep. I think I felt a lot like you do now.  My family came over and that helped just to have something to talk about other than what we were facing.  Do you have a friend that makes you laugh?  Maybe you can call her/him and try to divert your mind from the surgery.  Cancer treatment has come so far and you will do fine.  Just tell yourself you will get through it, and think about some of the things you would like to do once you are back on your feet!!

Fifteen months after the initial diagnosis, my husband is still here and doing fine.  We have enjoyed every day, and have a new appreciation for life, one for which I am very thankful.  I consider our new insight on life a gift, and realize that people who do not face such an illness may not realize how precious each and every moment is.  Take care and think happy thoughts...I know you'll do just fine.  Come back and tell us how everything goes.

The K

Hi Peggy,

     Please don't be afraid of the surgery. You are knocked out. Surgery is a breeze compared to chemo. I am a 38 year old mother of two children age 7 and 10. I was diagnosed with stage 4 colorectal cancer with 10-13 mets to my lungs in October of 2008. I had a colorectal re-section last October. I love the surgeons and hate the oncologists. When they first get you out of bed after surgery there will be much pain in your stomach and you will cough up phlegm. Each time you get out of bed the pain will get better! After surgery I did chemo. I had 8 rounds of FOLFIRI plus Avastin. The mets to my lungs disappeared. After 5 months they returned; increased in size and number. They now tell me I have 4-6months to live. I am to start chemo with palliative care. I am extremely terrified of chemo. I break out in hives and throw up in the garbage can beside my chair at chemo numerous times. The chemo experience was so bad that I was there for 10 hours every other week. However, I need to do this for my children. I'm sure you have many reasons to live. I wouldn't care if I had a colostomy bag as long as I'm here for my children. You have to put things in perspective. You have a GREAT chance of not needing the colostomy. They took 75% of my rectum but I did not need a colostomy. That is why they tried to shrink the tumor first. Good Luck. I'll pray for you.

 

On 9/18/2009 karenp412 wrote:

Hi Peggy,

     Please don't be afraid of the surgery. You are knocked out. Surgery is a breeze compared to chemo. I am a 38 year old mother of two children age 7 and 10. I was diagnosed with stage 4 colorectal cancer with 10-13 mets to my lungs in October of 2008. I had a colorectal re-section last October. I love the surgeons and hate the oncologists. When they first get you out of bed after surgery there will be much pain in your stomach and you will cough up phlegm. Each time you get out of bed the pain will get better! After surgery I did chemo. I had 8 rounds of FOLFIRI plus Avastin. The mets to my lungs disappeared. After 5 months they returned; increased in size and number. They now tell me I have 4-6months to live. I am to start chemo with palliative care. I am extremely terrified of chemo. I break out in hives and throw up in the garbage can beside my chair at chemo numerous times. The chemo experience was so bad that I was there for 10 hours every other week. However, I need to do this for my children. I'm sure you have many reasons to live. I wouldn't care if I had a colostomy bag as long as I'm here for my children. You have to put things in perspective. You have a GREAT chance of not needing the colostomy. They took 75% of my rectum but I did not need a colostomy. That is why they tried to shrink the tumor first. Good Luck. I'll pray for you.

Hi Karen

Thank you for your words of hope.  I am so sorry about you situation.  BUT, I've been on this site since May and I know that the doctors are often very off and wrong when they give a person a death date.  I hate that and I believe your attitude with prayer and exercise you will way out live the time frame they gave you and see your kids grow up.  All I can say is I don't have any children or family  to leave behind..I would probably feel better about this fight/journey if I did. I should not complain. Take care.

Beautiful. Thank you, I will try, I do ok most of the time but then it just hits me, hard.  So glad for this site and people like you.

Peggt

 

On 9/18/2009 psouthfla wrote:

Sorry you have to face this, but keep calm and try to look at this as I have to do this and I will be positive about what is going on.   Try to relax, take a deep breath and regain your thoughts.   Now your going through the surgery, then your going to recoupe and then you try to eat well no Sugar, fresh fruits lots and lots of veggies, and get up and move as much as you can even if just walking around your house or apt.   Then you will See your Dr. and they will get you on program  and you will follow it  You will fight it all the time and we here at comp[ass will listen to you anytime ,  I will pray for you  to come through this,.  My husband had the surgery and he did just fine,  I'm sure you will too.   Take care and don't for get to fight it .,  Bless you

 

So glad to have this site..Needed to cry and vent BigTime...This has been quite a fight/struggle. I have a ways to go.

Thank you for carning and sending incouragement,  Peggy