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What's Going On?

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Subject: What's Going On?
Date: 02/14/2006
My father-in-law was diagnosed with Stage IV pancreatic cancer on 5/31/05. The cancer had already spread to his liver and lymph nodes. He was given 3-6 months. His doctor said he would be really lucky if he made it the 6 months (that was 8-1/2 months ago). He decided he was not going to take any kind of treatment since there was no guarantee that it would give him any more time and he did not want to spend his last days sick all the time.

It took several months for any severe symptoms to show up. Around October he started having a lot of pain and was unable to eat very much. Over the next couple of months he had the usual symptoms...lose of appetite, gas, lose of vision, fatigue, pain, etc. He had told us that he knew the cancer was spreading and it wouldn't be long. He even told us he didn't think he would be here for Christmas, but he made it. In Jan., he started having scabs come up on his skin. His Hospice nurse said that it was the ammonia coming through his skin, which meant that his liver wasn't working like it should. For several weeks things got really bad...he was unable to get comfortable, slept a lot, was unable to eat, the pain had gotten worse, etc. Then all of a sudden one morning he woke up and everything had changed. It was almost like all the symptoms had gone away. That was 3 weeks ago. He has had more energy. He has been eating. He says the pain isn't as bad. All the Hospice nurses will say is "Well, it's good you are feeling better." They won't explain to us what could possibly be going on. We just can't understand how one day he could be doing so bad and get up the next morning and feel great. We are very happy that he is doing better, but we also know that he is not going to be healed from this. We are enjoying what good times we have left, but we also know the other shoe is going to drop.

He won't go back to his doctor. Since he is not taking any kind of treatment, he says there is nothing she can do except tell him he still has cancer and is still going to die. He says he knows what is going on inside his body. But we (the family) would like to know what is going on.

Can anyone explain what is going on? I have heard and seen for myself that a lot of people that are terminally ill with cancer will go through a period (whether it is days, hours or week) right before they die that they get better, but I have never heard it lasting over 3 weeks.

It has been a very difficult 8-1/2 months. The emotions have been up and down. Stress has been through the roof trying to get everything done. Like so many on this board, we are wondering when it will all end.

Rhonda
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Caregiver
Sparkley_eyes
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Subject: What's Going On??
Date: 02/19/2006
Your story is similiar to my husband who was diagnosed on the same day 05/31/2005. However, we did the chemotherapy and radiation and more chemotherapy. At the end,three weeks before he passed away February this year, he was feeling better and walking the neighborhood. He did what he liked to do best, that is to be with friends and helping out. He was eating full plates of food which hadn't been done in months. Then just out of nowhere, he got real sick and was in the hospital for a week. He came home and Hospice was ordered and then end was near.
Just make the most of each day, talk about anything and everything. My heart is full and empty at the same time.
Subject: Hope
Date: 03/09/2006
I notice that it's been almost a month since you posted this message, and I am curious to know how your father-in-law is doing at this point in time. I hate to hear you say that you know he will not be cured from this. Miracles CAN happen, and I pray that your father-in-law has experienced one.

~Terri
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