Rhoda Ostomy Memorial All Are Invited!!

3 Posts | Page(s): 1 

Rhoda Ostomy Memorial All Are Invited!!

by Super01Mom on Fri Sep 03, 2010 06:52 PM

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Let me first introduce you to Rhoda Ostomy. Rhoda is my colostomy she got her name from the Mary Tyler Moore show, you know the obnoxious best friend that lived in the same apartment building. Well the name fits her perfect, my Rhoda is obnoxious, she is loud and demanding and well it's time the bit** die. Okay she did save my life but ever since then she has been a pain in my ass. She talks out her butt, she is always full of shi* and she is super demanding. When I try to shut her up well she seeks revenge , I will change her bag and before I can get her changed she starts talking shi* again. Can't take her anywhere, we go to the movie theatre and in the most quiet part of the movie she starts with her loud obnoxious noises again, I think she has terrecks or something, the poor thing can't control being obnoxious and loud, and I always get blamed for her behavior. She also doesn't help out on the romance department , always has to act up and spoil the moment , it is almost like being a conjoined twin. Just want a few minutes  alone without her being at my side continueously. Well I decided it is time to get rid of Rhoda. I researched and found the perfect hitman, Dr. Kasier at USC Norris Cancer Hospital, and he has agreed to take down Rhoda and snuff her out permanently. After 2 1/2 years being conjoined with Rhoda it is time to separate us both and give me my life back. Her take down will be late October, and the memorial will be Thanksgiving evening, what better day than Thanksgiving , to give thanks of the life she had and to celebrate her passing. Each guest will receive one of Rhoda's bags, empty of course and they can attach a little note of their memory of Rhoda. I have designed a make shift coffin, decorated and all, and each guest will distribute their contribution in her box and we will perform a little ritual, a burning of Rhoda and do a little happy dance. Ding Dong the witch is dead will be playing in the background as we say good bye to Rhoda Ostomy forever, and pray she doesn't come back and haunt me for years to come and no reincarnations allowed. So, if you are up to a celebration all are invited!!! Thought we could all use a little humor , it gets us through the hard times and reminds us we do have a purpose in this life!

Sheryl:)

RE: Rhoda Ostomy Memorial All Are Invited!!

by MarcelaStagni on Wed Nov 24, 2010 01:26 AM

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On Sep 03, 2010 6:52 PM Super01Mom wrote:

Let me first introduce you to Rhoda Ostomy. Rhoda is my colostomy she got her name from the Mary Tyler Moore show, you know the obnoxious best friend that lived in the same apartment building. Well the name fits her perfect, my Rhoda is obnoxious, she is loud and demanding and well it's time the bit** die. Okay she did save my life but ever since then she has been a pain in my ass. She talks out her butt, she is always full of shi* and she is super demanding. When I try to shut her up well she seeks revenge , I will change her bag and before I can get her changed she starts talking shi* again. Can't take her anywhere, we go to the movie theatre and in the most quiet part of the movie she starts with her loud obnoxious noises again, I think she has terrecks or something, the poor thing can't control being obnoxious and loud, and I always get blamed for her behavior. She also doesn't help out on the romance department , always has to act up and spoil the moment , it is almost like being a conjoined twin. Just want a few minutes  alone without her being at my side continueously. Well I decided it is time to get rid of Rhoda. I researched and found the perfect hitman, Dr. Kasier at USC Norris Cancer Hospital, and he has agreed to take down Rhoda and snuff her out permanently. After 2 1/2 years being conjoined with Rhoda it is time to separate us both and give me my life back. Her take down will be late October, and the memorial will be Thanksgiving evening, what better day than Thanksgiving , to give thanks of the life she had and to celebrate her passing. Each guest will receive one of Rhoda's bags, empty of course and they can attach a little note of their memory of Rhoda. I have designed a make shift coffin, decorated and all, and each guest will distribute their contribution in her box and we will perform a little ritual, a burning of Rhoda and do a little happy dance. Ding Dong the witch is dead will be playing in the background as we say good bye to Rhoda Ostomy forever, and pray she doesn't come back and haunt me for years to come and no reincarnations allowed. So, if you are up to a celebration all are invited!!! Thought we could all use a little humor , it gets us through the hard times and reminds us we do have a purpose in this life!

Sheryl:)

Dear Sheryl

I love your sense of humor..i had to laugh reading about your Rhoda...which i am sure is gone by now..right?

My husband ken (52) was recently diagnosed with colorectal cancer T3..a tumor low in the rectum..he is starting radio/chemo for 7 weeks to shrink tumor before surgery...the problem is that ken refuses to have surgery because of the location of the tumor he might have a colostomy..and he refuses that idea which scares me because he is only taking half the treatment...no surgery will open the doors for recurrence...

Sometimes i panic...sometimes i feel so frustrated...sometimes i feel so lonely ...i am frustrated because he refuses surgery...and i am afraid that radio/chemo wont be enough to kill all the cancer cells on the rectum...

I really enjoyed reading your rhoda memorial story..please tell me more about your experience with rhoda??? was it really that bad? 

Thankyou for sharing such a funny story..i appreciate your sense of humor...i need that..i have not stopped crying since i knew ken has cancer..i lost my mom 2 years ago for lung cancer...i am scared...

God bless you richly

hugggssss

marcela

RE: Rhoda Ostomy Memorial All Are Invited!!

by captjeff on Thu Nov 25, 2010 04:06 PM

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hi,

did you have a permanent colostomy and then have it reversed?i'm a colan cancer surviver w/bag,and was informed that its not reversable. any info would be great.

thanks,

jeff

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