Long Night

I have been sitting here all night listening to my sister's raspy breathing.  She is on the last road of her courageous journey with stage 4 lung cancer with mets to the brain.  I don't know if she is in pain.  Every once in awhile she partially opens her eyes and I tell her I am with her but she cannot communicate with me.  She is on morphine patches and I can give her liquid morphine if I think she has pain and ativan for anxiety.  That's all I can do now.  Her daughter will be here in a few hours and hopefully she can then go quietly.  It has been such a long night.

Barbara

Dear Barbara,

I hope your sister has found peace since your message was posted early this morning.

May you also find some peace and serenity after your long mission as a caregiver.

Now you can rest also after a job well done.

I am so sorry for your loss.

Judy passed away this evening on her own terms.  Nothing stressful - she just stopped breathing when no one was looking.  Her adult children had gotten here about 4PM and she passed about 8PM. It seems she actually waited for them to say their good-byes.  I find that amazing even though I've read and hospice told me that we pick the time of death ourselves.  My sister was the kind of person that when she was visiting, if she decided to go she just went.  Looks like she did that tonight too.  I will miss her.  She was my sister and my friend.  Thank you Joan for your kind words.

Barbara

I'm sorry for your loss. My dad looked at me, then breathed in but never let it out. I'm glad her kids were able to be there./

~Hugs