Mother caring for daughter with breast cancer

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Mother caring for daughter with breast cancer

by annienz on Tue Jan 18, 2011 09:11 AM

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My 30 year old daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer in July, has since had mastectomy and chemotherapy.  She is having her other breast removed this February.  I do not live in her city so moved in with her and her husband and baby for four and a half months so I could take care of the baby and do household chores so her husband could work.  I love my daughter but I have found this time very difficult as she has been very short with me and angry.  (Not all the time as we have also had good times as well). 

I held my tongue so many times but inwardly felt very lonely and sad.  I tried to ask my daughter not to be rude to me but usually got the same reply.

I really struggle with feeling guilty that I could not be a saint and never feel down or angry with her given that she is and has been through all that she has. 

Any thoughts for me to cope when I go back to stay soon?

RE: Mother caring for daughter with breast cancer

by dmbuckley on Tue Apr 12, 2011 02:53 AM

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I see that your post was in January so you may have solved your issue.  I have no real advice but wanted to tell yu that I am also caring for a 30 year old daughter, infant son, and husband while she is receiving chemo.  I know exactly how you feel because I am feeling exactly the same way.  Also, I know exactly how your daughter is treating you because mine is the same way toward me.  I console myself by telling myself that I am a safe place for her to vent her rage.  I understand this intellectually but it still hurts emotionally.  I'm sorry that I can't offer words of advice but I thought it might help to know that there is someone else out there going through the same thing and that what we're going through is probablay the norm.  

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