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Being Single With Cancer

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Subject: Being Single With Cancer
Date: 08/01/2006
This may sound silly given all of the other challenges cancer brings. But I am a 37 year old woman who was very socially active when I was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins lymphoma 2 years ago. Six months ago I separated with my beau of three years, and am having a difficult time considering he couldn't handle the cancer. I have and continue to embrace a very positive outlook concerning my health. But, realize I am under the belief that I will never meet anyone now that I have this diagnosis. Is there anyone out there that has started a relationship after being diagnosed with non- hodgkins lymphoma?
Doctor / Nurse
Doctor / Nurse
Amnia
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Subject: my Thoughts
Date: 08/06/2006
Dear Melissa,

you are so lucky to be rid of your ex-beau.

over the course of a marriage there are going to be crises. lots of them. it is better you found out now what kind of person he was. Imagine for a moment you got married. You had 2.5 children, a mortgage, a car note, a dog. Imagine NOW you were diagnosed with NHL, and he can't cope and walks out on you, leaving you alone with cancer to raise kids and pay bills.

you will one day look back upon this and see it as a positive. you will tell your grand kids that if it wasn't for that NHL that you beat back in 2006, you would never have met their grandpa.

back to your question. tons of people with cancer get into and out of relationships every day, just like everyone else. when you think of yourself, do not think of yourself as a cancer patient or everyone you meet will think so too. think of yourself as a wonderful, vibrant person. we are all composed of many parts. your cancer is but one insignificant part. it does not define who you are.

there are services for busy people who arrange lunchtime "dates" so you can both eat lunch and meet new people. there are web based dating services like match.com . I think the best place still to meet people is at work or through friends. be persistent. and when you least expect it, that's when it often happens.

Be strong. Be persistent. Don't give up!
-Amnia
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