I'm a firm believer that you and your oncologis, or even your doctor should have a good relationship. And that includes being able to ask ANY and ALL questions you may have without feeling you are stupid, or made to feel you are taking up the doctors time. We must all remember they are working FOR YOU! You are not seeing them as a favor to you, you are PAYING them for their advice, knowledge and wise counsel.
I don't know why type of treatment center either of you are going to, but I think it must be the wrong one. A teaching/learning hospital has specialists in just your type of cancer, and they are the most caring sincere doctors I've ever met. They are working there because they have a passion for research, treatments, and cures. If you go to your small hometown cancer center, odds are there is an oncologist that treats ALL cancers, and he just follows the "normal operating procedure". Teaching hospitals cost no more than any other cancer treatment centers, yet they are in on the most up to date procedures, treatments, and clinical trials.
Having said all that, they also take time to answer any concerns you may have. They also take the time to explain all details of your scans, your treatments, and your medicines. You are NEVER left in the dark, or made to feel like you are imposing on them.
So, I would suggest to both of you to get another opinion. I myself ran into the same thing in my small town. I am so glad I sought out another opinion. I hope you both find a good cancer treatment center to go to, and I hope you find the answers you need. No one should EVER settle for a non answer. You should INSIST the doctor spend time explaining EVERYTHING to you. If he doesn't, don't move out of the room. YOU ARE PAYING HIM - AND HE WORKS FOR YOU!
Byrd