Need tests but too scared to have them

Mum diagnosed stage 4 aggressive colon cancer plus liver lungs spine pelvis and bones... its bad i am sure... only 7 months after endoscopy and colonoscopy in Nov11 that were all clear.

NOW doctor says its hereditary and I need to have same... FEAR has set in...

68yo Mum is non smoker non drinker been on healthy calorie controlled diet for 22 years, is in healthy weight range, and has been meticulous about having all required tests MORE often than required and she gets a bad diagnosis.

I am 48, smoke WAY too much (chain), drank a lot in younger days but not so much now... eat garbage to the point where I had to have a lapband to stable weight gain and cant control myself... high stress job, irratic sleep patterns.... and NEVER deal with health issues adequately... no pap smear in 15 years  never had mammogram... got the picture???

How can I possibly deal with this? It's like I know it will be bad.

I

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom.  So, it's not that unusual for some women to be in the same place medically as you are.  I've know many, as well as men, who don't start taking their medical care seriously until middle age.  Now all you have to do is pull up your big girl panties, and get to your primary care physician so he/she can get you started.  Fear always come with the unknown, and until you face those unknowns, the fear will remain.  So, pick up the phone and get those tests done.  It's okay, and I'll bet your mom will be happy to learn you're being pro active in your health.