I began reading this message board in June 2006 when my father was dx with a Grade 4 GBM looking for the list of things to exepct. My father lost his battle on Sept 8 - 3 months to the day of his first symptom. He chose not to have surgery because he wanted to take the shortest road possible for my mom. He did undergo radiation and chemo treatment and on the day of his death we learned that neither of the treatments helped. All the treatments did was contain the tumor and once the treatments were over the tumor 'exploded' to twice its size. It doubled in size from July 31 to Sept 8 when my dad slipped into a coma. His last treatment was on Aug 21 and he declined quickly after that. Within 5 days he was having great difficulty speaking and walking and within another week it was very had to understand him. 4 days later he completely lost movement in his right side and we were in the process of getting hospice care when he slipped into the coma. We again chose no surgery and were able to get him home for his final passing. Hospice came in and was wonderful to inform us of how quickly this would happen. My dad died peacefully in his favorite spot with his wife and 3 daughters surrounding him. All of his other family was on the road to come and visit him. It is still a blur to me that he is gone but I wanted to pass along our experience so that it may help others make decisions and to see how the progress of the tumor can change the patient. My fathers tumor was so big that it pushed the left side of his brain into the right side and that is why he passed away so quickly.
To anyone out there that is going to accept what is being handed to them and not have surgery - please do not think that you are a coward. My dad was the strongest man that I know and his love for my mom helped him to make his decision because he wanted to make the remainder of his life easier on her. It was very hard for my family to watch him deteriorate because he was such an active person but my love for him enabled me to crawl into his hosiptal bed while he was in a coma and tell him that it was okay to go on.
I pray nightly for anyone who is dealing with this horrible type of cancer. For caregivers and family members who are dealing with this - please take advantage of everyday that you have with your loved one. Other family members kept thinking that they had more time with my father but the end came rather quickly. Try to clear any unresolved issues and say the things that you want to say because my father lost his understanding and comprehension within a matter of days and I kept putting that off. I wanted to say the things to his face so that I knew that he heard me but I lost that time so instead I said it while he was in a coma (I hope that he heard). This tumor can take someone rather quickly and in the big picture they are better off for it so that they do not need to suffer.
God Bless All of You!
I was so sorry to read about your father. My mother was also diagnosed with a GBM 4 in June. Hers was not operable and halfway through the radiation and chemo, she was advised to stop because it was making her much worse. We've had hospice for several weeks and they tell us that she only has a few weeks left at most. This is a terrible disease and my heart goes out to you and your family. Karen
Nicole, I am so incredibly sorry that you and your Mom and sisters had to endure such a loss. Cling to those special times you shared with your Dad. I too believe even while in a coma, they hear us speaking to them. After nearly 3 weeks, I am still in the "fog" that you must be in. Comfort your Mom as much as you can. She needs you and your sisters more than ever.
I tried taking as much off of Mom's plate as possible and just letting her begin her grieving process. She was overwhelmed by company and phone calls and many times just wanted to run away and hide so she could have a good cry. Maybe you can help your Mom "run away" for even a few minutes or a couple of hours if she feels that way over the next few days. I remember taking her for a drive when everyone was at our house. We drove around, laughed and cried together and just grabbed a coke at Sonic. It really helped her disappear for a while.
Even through the pain of losing him, I do count it joy and a blessing that my Dad went quickly like yours. He survived 6 weeks from his first symptom. If you have been reading this board, you may know that he was dx July 10 2006 and passed away August 25, 2006. He opted for the surgery, however I believe that God spared him suffering by taking him that quickly.
Most of all, always remember that he chose not to have surgery and that you and your Mom could not have changed the outcome, no matter what. We have already second and third-guessed ourselves throughout the process. It can drive you crazy. We choose now to not second guess, but to believe that ultimately the outcome was inevitable in his situation. No matter where he was treated, which doctor we chose, or when he was dx, etc. God took him. God knew before he was born when he would go home to Heaven.
Your family will be in my prayers.
I am just so sorry for your loss. There are no words really, but know that you are in the company of others who understand what you have been through and how your loss occurred. This message board helps to remember that many have the same feelings of helplessness and loss. It doesn't take away your pain, but it is a therapy of sorts. Please continue to keep us informed and know that you remain in our thoughts and prayers.
My dad opted for treatment. He had surgery on 4/25/06 and did okay. He subsequently had a blood clot in his left calf and a seizure requiring two diferent hospitalizations. This let him weak. He went to inpatient therapy for two weeks and then went to Italy for one month. Upon return he had a second surgery to debulk the tumor and got a nasty staph infection which after 7 weeks of semi-vegetative state utlimately took his life as he was unable to fight it following chemo, radiation and the cancer itself which left him weak. Six months from diagnosis to death and it was a hell of a roller coaster ride in between. God bless you and keep you safe from this MOTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Rose