Caring for my husband with throat cancer.

My husband just went to the dr's for his chemo and radiation schedule.  He usually is the most positive person.  Last night he told me that he is getting depressed.  He met with the radiation dr. yesterday, so she could do a scope.  He said she sounded like as if this is going to be a challenge for her.  He told me last night that nothing is bringing him joy. How do I help him stay positive?

CANCERFREE50,

I apologize that no one has replied by now, but I will try. There is a Head and Neck section on this site and that is where many of us H & N patients/ survivors check in to see the posts.

If your husband is normally a positive person, he may just be going thru a spell of "Why me". I am also a pretty positive person and think I can do anything and have a Red "S" on my T-shirt.  I can honestly say, that when I first heard the words "You have cancer", well things got different from that point on for awhile. Oh, I held a "Pity Party" for myself one evening, but realized that I wasn't helping my situation. So, I changed my mind and decided that I was going to give this battle my all. This week marks my 8th year anniversary of completing my treatments.

I had Base of Tongue cancer and the Surgeon had to remove a good part of my tongue along with a radical neck disection. No saliva for me, but others have better results. The Doctors can give him some anti-depressant med's if needed. A fair share of the posters on the H & N section often mention that they were given some to help them get thru this and don't need them now.

You asked how can you help him stay positive? My wife was with me during the first few weeks of my Surgery and recovery at home. She had taken some of her vacation time to make sure I was okay. Her just being there, if I needed anything was very helpful. Just be there if he needs something. This isn't an easy road to travel, but it is doable.

Again, please check out the Head and Neck cancer section here.

My Best to Both of You and Everyone Here

Thank you PopPop for your reply! 

My husbands cancer is also the base of his tongue, throat and neck.  Surgery is not an option we were told.

He started his chemo last Wednesday.   We were told he wouldn't feel that bad till next week. Not knowing which questions to ask etc., he has been vomiting and nauseous for the past 3 days. Unfortunately, his prescriptions are with Express Scripts which is mail order. His nausea meds are still in the mail. If we had known, we would have prepared and paid the extra money to have the nausea pills handy. Finally, we had to call Express Scripts last night and have them transfer the one nausea med to our local CVS, so he took a pill just a little while ago. 

I am not working right now, so I can take care of him.  I constantly go in to the bedroom to see what I can do to make him comfortable, take his temperature, etc.  I can't wait for him to go for his post chemo dr appt. tomorrow.  I will talk to the dr. about the anti-depressants.  He hasn't been able to drink as much water as told, or eat anything due to the nausea.  I hope this pill he just took helps, so I can get him to eat and drink more. 

I will check the H & N section here. 

Prayers and healing thoughts to you and everyone going through this.