this is the hardest thing I have ever had to go through in my life. I thought I could deal with the fight which has went on for 7 years now. Me and my family have all been there to fight. But we all have totally lost it including my brother. We don't loose it in front of him but we are loosing it. He was given 4 months after finding out at thanksgiving that the cancer (kidney) returned with a vengence in his brain. He was receiving radiation but they stopped it last week because it doing more harm then good.
so now the fight to live for my brother is over and we are falling apart. I never hardly cried before when he was fighting... now I cannot stop.
He is declining rapidly and is starting 24 hour hospice today. I think the hardest part for me right now is to see my strong and feerless mom falling apart. I have never seen her like this before and its hard.
My sister in law won't let her in the house to see him most days because he doesn't get out of bed. I don't understand why my mom can't go visit if he is in bed... but my sister in law doesn't let her. They don't get along so this is making it worse between them.
I thought after they quit the radiation last week that he would start feeling a little better but it got worse.