How Do I Be A Good Friend?

On 1/18/2007 Mimi328 wrote:

A dear friend was recently diagnosed with this cancer.  I'm at a loss as to how to react when I'm around him.  Should I try to keep things as normal as possible, let him take the lead on talking about it?  I feel like I have to guard every word for fear of saying something stupid.  Also, when you were diagnosed, did you tell your co-workers and friends?  What's the best way to be a true friend to this person?  Any response will be very much appreciated.

I hav e cholangiocarcinoma

when i found out I didn 't want to talk about it as I was afraidso I hated anyone asking about it

I recommend not raising it unless you knowa success story about someone who has the disease. If  you come across anything scary or negative don't share it. Just be a brightpositive friend and talk about regular things. Tell them to let you know anytimetheyneed  to talk.

I am oneof 40% that respond positively to c hemo (I'm on epirubicin, cisplatin and flourouracil) my tumor after 6 treatments has shrunk from 11cm down to 6 cm. Now I'm on  a maintenance plan.   I have a  fan tasticquality  of life andI have heard of a guy who has the same cancer as me on the same treatment andheisstill going after having this cancer for 14 years.There is hope. Secrets be positive and pray and ask everyone to pray.

god bless and all the best

Beka

On 1/19/2007 Bekac wrote:

 

On 1/18/2007 Mimi328 wrote:

A dear friend was recently diagnosed with this cancer.  I'm at a loss as to how to react when I'm around him.  Should I try to keep things as normal as possible, let him take the lead on talking about it?  I feel like I have to guard every word for fear of saying something stupid.  Also, when you were diagnosed, did you tell your co-workers and friends?  What's the best way to be a true friend to this person?  Any response will be very much appreciated.

 

I hav e cholangiocarcinoma

when i found out I didn 't want to talk about it as I was afraidso I hated anyone asking about it

I recommend not raising it unless you knowa success story about someone who has the disease. If  you come across anything scary or negative don't share it. Just be a brightpositive friend and talk about regular things. Tell them to let you know anytimetheyneed  to talk.

I am oneof 40% that respond positively to c hemo (I'm on epirubicin, cisplatin and flourouracil) my tumor after 6 treatments has shrunk from 11cm down to 6 cm. Now I'm on  a maintenance plan.   I have a  fan tasticquality  of life andI have heard of a guy who has the same cancer as me on the same treatment andheisstill going after having this cancer for 14 years.There is hope. Secrets be positive and pray and ask everyone to pray.

god bless and all the best

Beka

Beka -- thank you so much for your reply.  And hooray for you on the good response for you to treatment.  I have worked with him for many years and consider him one of my true friends.  I do think he has a positive outlook and I've been praying fervently.  I worried that keeping things normal and talking about what we always do would give him the impression I don't recognize his situation.   So your answer meant a lot to me -- I see now that's important.  Thank you very much and may God continue to bless you with health. 

Mimi