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What A Journey We're On

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Subject: what a journey we're on
Date: 02/16/2007

Hi everyone,

  I've read every message and cried with so many of you as I read your story.  I feel so emotional with this subject.  My Dad was just diagnosed with adenocarcinoma- pancreatic cancer- early in January.  He is 72 and active.  He's had other minor health problems but nothing to suggest cancer!  He just started getting sick after Christmas, vomitting and nausea.  Thought he had the flu so never told anyone, but a couple days later, he turned yellow.  How I can relate to the comment about the tough male gender!  Dad didn't go in to the doc until Friday after Christmas, with pain over his liver and whole abdomen.  He had bloating, too.  He spent the New Year's weekend in the hospital, where they ran  many tests.  Only one brother was able to be with him, since the rest of us kids live so far away.  How I cried to read about the "Mum" in Australia- I live 6 hours by plane from Dad.  

They released Dad from the hospital on New Year's Day, with instructions to call another hospital which could handle his illness better!!  He couldn't get into the larger hospital right away, so when he did, we were disappointed to learn that there was so little hope for his condition.  The  Dr. who did his GI scope did recommend Whipple with chemo, but he understood Dad's wish for quality of life.

Dad decided not to pursue the surgery or chemo.  The odds are so slim, and he didn't want to live his days out in a hospital feeling sick.  We helped him find some supplements to take, and he went home with pain and nausea prescriptions.  He hasn't needed to take them since the first week.  His jaundice gradually disappeared and the bloating went away.  He had some stomach tenderness and lack of appetite, which also got better for a while.   

For over a month now, after spending 10 days with Dad, I've journaled his progress every day.  This past week has been discouraging.  He had energy last weekend, maybe over-did.  Monday he started feeling weaker, had more itching gradually spreading over his body.  It's been bad on his palms and soles lately, which I learned is a sign of final stage.  I've found so much info online, and learned that pancreatic enzymes are so vital to digestion.  Dad's appetite has dropped off, almost everything turns his stomach at the thought of it.  We got him some enzymes- they seem to make eating easier.  He plans to return to see his Dr on Monday if he's still getting weaker.  So far, abdominal pain hasn't been an issue, it's lack of sleep from itching. 

I believe God could give my dad a miracle, so it's been good to see the faith of so many of you.  I know, too, that God has a plan in this, and we'll spend eternity together in His presence.  But I know the pain and heartache will still come with Dad's passing if God doesn't heal him here, so I'm asking for your prayers to be strong for Dad.  I don't have any idea how long the "final" stage will last or how severe his symptoms will be.  It sounds like it's been tragic for some of you, and I extend my sympathy and empathy.  I don't know if I'll get to be with my Dad in his last days or hours.  He may come to stay with my sister so we can share in his care.  Either way, I know that God is with him, and I pray Dad will be comforted. 

Well, if I am too wordy, forgive me.  I've appreciated all of you being so open, and this is just what I needed at a time like this.  God bless you all as you journey this road with your family and the rest of us out here in it with you!  Pray-  seek God and you will find Him when you look for Him with all your heart.  He can give you peace...

Ruthie4J

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