My Dad is now suffering with liver cancer. Many treatments, nothing is working. He's suffering everyday. Even though I'm an adult with my own family I feel as if the rug has been pulled out from under me. I'm a scared little girl again and don't know what to do. Now he confides in me and leans on me for support. I'm happy to give it but the role reversal has been so quick it leaves my head spinning. I feel as if I was living in a protective bubble for 43 years and now - bam! Wake up, grow up - now!
I don't have all the answers, I don't know what to do but I feel as if I should. How do I continue to keep my life organized and under control? How do I protect my child from the hurt and fear of having a grandfather that is so ill when he's always been strong and active? How do I face the inevitable? I know there are no answers and nothing about this awful disease is fair. I just don't know.
Thank you for providing a place to let this all out.