On 7/13/2007
Merrilee wrote:
I have gone through counseling, I have talked with family members and have started a garden and I am just empty. I hurt. I sleep. I am depressed and I don't want pills. I am a 38 year old mother of three and being strong for my husband's four year battle has left me winded and weak. I am lonely and sometimes scared. We were supposed to grow old together and raise our children together. Our children are 12, 10 and 2 years old. I think perhaps I need to just cry and be alone and then maybe come out. I have been asked if I have started dating or told I need to move on. How cold. I have been told ............"What would your husband say to you now- if he could talk to you?" That hurts so much more to even think. I know he is in a better place without the cancer but now I feel like someone has dropped me out of a plane into some strange country. People will see me and some will cry and want me to comfort them and I just do not understand. I choose to stay home or away from people. I would like to ask you as I have the Creator....... how long does this last and when will I feel a little better? Thank you for your time.
Merrilee
Dear Merrilee,
I am so sorry for your loss .I know it will take a lot of time to recover
from such a sad thing. But you have 3 beautiful children to live and try to be happy for . I cannot begin to imagine how you feel but time will heal slowly.I have my husband suffering from EC * Esophagus Cancer) and
I feel helpless but just hope all the time he will be well. He is in hospital been there since 29th May he was 65yrs yesterday.. I dread to think of anything happening to him. So I know you must feel totally lost without your beloved husband. Hang in there and it will get better , but it will take a lot of time.
I pray for you and your children.
Be strong.
Kind thoughts Mary