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Emotionally Wrecked?????

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Subject: Emotionally Wrecked?????
Date: 09/27/2007

Dear Sister/Brother Cancer Patients,

A little background first.

I was an oncology nurse for years at a top notch hospital. That has it's good points and it's bad ones. Sometimes you know too much and others not enough. I have been retired for10 years.

Five years ago I developed O-Cancer. I was devastated to say the least. Had chemo, went into remission for 2 years. Then it reared it's ugly little head again. Chemo again, remission again, etc.

I have just found out that its back. This time not just the ovarian area but lymph nodes and outer lining of my stomach.

I now look as if I'm 9 months pregnant (sign of ovarian cancer). I've also had about a 40 lb weight gain. Also a sign of O Cancer.

Having said all of this I have come to peace with all of this.

I refuse to have the Dr. give me a time limit. I told him he didn't know when he was going to die so why should I. He said he never thought of it that way.

2 out of 5 of the times I had chemo, I became "Ms. Baldylocks" now that was an experience I can assure you. Before it got to that point I had gone shopping for wigs which is covered by my insurance, thank God.

Nobody could tell it was a wig. I became a blonde, a brunette, or a redhead at will.

Now I am in Stage 4. I have decide I will live my life to the fullest with my husband. doing anything and everything that we have always wanted to do. I refuse to become more of a victim. We are all born and we will all die.

Thats the way it is. I try not to linger on it as much as I can or it will drive you nuts. I spend more time with my extended family and refuse to let anybody talk about cancer.

Who knows maybe next week they'll have a cure. DON'T THINK it's the end. There is always hope.

DON'T WASTE THE TIME YOU HAVE LEFT BY MAKING YOURSELF MISERABLE and everyone around you. Live your life!!!!!!!!!

 

 

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