I am a child of the most amazing man in the world who is suffering from Prostate Cancer, he was diagnosed almost 7 years ago, and given a time period of no more than 6 months. My daddy has stayed so strong through this all, determined to pull through, and just fight it until they find the cure, because they will find the cure for him. My dadddy never wanted to undergo Chemo therapy or any desperate measures such as this as he wanted to preserve his quality of life rather than his quantity. as things have progressed over the years, the natural methods, and massive treatments stopped working. My daddy gave those ways up when they seemed silly as it came down to a chance of life or death. My daddy has been on Chemo therapy for about a year and a half now. The doctors told him his body could only handle three cycles (approx. 3 months), but as always he has surpassed their expectations. And made an amazing fight. He recently had a change in oncologists and his new Dr. gave him a month or so off chemo, so he could get a break. My daddy’s cancer has now gone into the bone and spread throughout his body. He is so weak sometimes, but his new medicine helps him get through the days easier.
It is so hard to watch my strong tough daddy be in so much pain from so much as standing up, I want to give him all of my strength, everything in me but I can not. And that is what kills me I cant even make him feel better. It took me about 3 years to stop being a selfish child and accept and not be scared of my daddy’s cancer, but now I am having trouble dealing with the helpless position I am sitting in watching who I know is the most amazing man I will ever know. I try to spend as much time with him as possible, but time this time is so much more precious than any other time, any other place, any other day. This is time with my daddy. I just want a way to make him feel better. I just want to take the pain away. I want to do something.. I cant have him going through this pain. He does not deserve it. He does not deserve to have a low self esteem bc of what “other (non-sick) people will think”. The thing that is the hardest is when my daddy gets sad and depressed and talks negatively about himself, his life choices or his appearance. I try to reassure him that he is the most handsomest dad in the world! I just want all of his stresses to go away and I want him to be on a boat on the river doing everything he has always dreamed, in complete joy. That will make him happy and his happiness will make his cancer fighting cells happy, and he will get better. The thing here is, I know that he is going to fight and make it, I know he will he has too. He will. But I just hate to see him in the unpleasant situation for so long. Oh god I feel so horrible I wish I could take it all from him. He doesn’t deserve this.
Any help is greatly appreciated.
Thanks,
Kacey