Hi LaRue,
So sorry! I just found your 2/27 reply this morning, 3/3/08. Somehow my email decided that the CancerCompass site was spam so the message went to a spam file instead of the inbox. That won't happen again.
I am heartsick to hear about your husband. If he is on morphine, that's good for the pain but it made my husband irrational and cranky. He was impatient with everyone and once he got onto percocet he was nicer. LaRue, I hope there are people who are supporting you at this time. We are very private people and Phil didn't want visitors nor for anyone to know, but you can only keep people who love you away for so long. I imagine you are beyond exhausted.
I'm at home with my husbandwho was released last Friday from the hospital after a 3 week stay. He had the radical cystectomy surgery where his bladder, prostate, and lymph nodes were removed and a new bladder was created. He went through the surgery just fine but his digestive tract took some time to start working again. He had terrible diarrhea and I was glad to be there to help him. He was going crazy to get out of there too. We had all good news; the chemotherapy killed all the cancer cells. He had a 20% chance of living to 5 years after diagnosis. I am just exhausted even though we had good news. I think the last 7 months have sucked the wind out of my sails. Not to mention but a year ago this time he told me he wanted a divorce; I felt like some body snatcher had moved into him. It has been a wretched year. Well the cancer sure put his old self back into him. It brought us back together and I pray we stay that way.
It's sure a relief to safely vent with someone who understands this insanity. You can't tell friends or family about the horrors of living with cancer.
My husband is learning to use a catheter to remove the urine from his new bladder. I am helping by "irrigating" flushing out the area using saline and injecting it into the cather. It is nothing I ever imagined I would be called upon to do but it has to be done and it is all ultimately good.
LaRue is there anything I can do for you from so far away? Please say so, I am thinking of you and your husband.
later,
Elizabeth