After my husband had surgery to remove his Melanoma and lymph nodes, we had family and friends who volunteered to help in any way they could. As my husband's surgery was scheduled I had two weeks to plan for the event. I had dinners made and frozen, I had stocked up on everything I thought we would need, including having a TV mounted on the wall in a spare bedroom. It gave me something I could control.
It amazed me that the one thing that really lifted his spirits was when his friends came to visit. They listened to his adventure at the hospital and his concerns for the future. Then the conversation would turn to everyday events, hunting, horses, work, politics, the impossible females in their lives...etc. It took him out of the world of cancer, even if only for a moment. I used that valuable lesson to do all I could to keep him involved in the world of the living.
My husband had never missed a day of work in our 26 years of marriage. For him, keeping him busy was very, very important. My sister and I would plot together regarding chores that no one else but my husband could do for us. It really made a huge difference in his attitude & recovery. I suppose it gave him something he could control.