Before I begin my New Years Eve night, I can not help but to get this out. Today when I took my mom to rad ( cervical cancer stageIV) they told her not to come the rest of the week, just on Friday and also want to do a pelvic exam. This would be here last week anyway. She got weighed and she had lost another 5 lbs. She says shes eating and I do see her, but what struck my interest was her response to them telling her about more weight loss. She said I am eating it is the diease that is making me lose weight, this is what happens when people are dieing.(spelling ?) That was the first time I realized she is not fighting. She has been so quiet and doesn't talk much about anything. She said she's not depressed. For a week before she went in to the hospital and found out, she said she knew it would something like this. And she has already thought about it, enough to even take most of her money out of the bank, incase she did'nt make it out of the hospital. She knew and never said anything. Until we forced her to go to the emergency room. It is so hard for me to accept that maybe her fight is up. She has just begun. I tried to be so positive and try to even reasure that stats are not also right. They are just stats. I pray every minute for hope and for her to get strong and fight this beast. I t is to soon to give up! Anyone have any ideas of encouragement?