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Taking Care Of Mom

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Subject: taking care of Mom
Date: 01/22/2008

Just need to find a way to vent. I was on the phone today for 45 minutes trying to make an appointment for my mother-in-law with her cancer doctor. She has Stage 4 lung cancer, refuses treatment but also refuses to go on hospice. She loves to go to doctor appointments, and so we are going again just to find out the same information for the umpteenth time. She is having constant back pain, and we have been to several docs-all of whom have recommended yet another specialist, none of whom have just said "it's the cancer".  She is 78 and just buried Pop in October who also had lung cancer, but he put himself on hospice (what a blessing!)  I am the closest child(in-law) and have the most flexible job so I do all the driving and home care. It is the frustration of me knowing there is nothing really left to do for her, and yet we continue to go to doctor appointments because she is still looking for a magic cure. We live in a large metro area and mom will only see doctors affiliated with a university hospital that is nearly one hour away. Each visit takes about 5 hours out of my day with getting her in and out of the car and huge medical center. She still lives her house but cannot do any of the cleaning-i get to do that also.

 I think I am just tired today, but wonder if anyone had some magic for me?!

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