On 1/31/2008
Garcia wrote:
I am 47 yo and was diagnosed with NMCLC in mid December. The diagnosis came from a test i had due to another illness. I was asymptomanic - felt fine. So this came as a complete surprise and I handled it quite well -asking the doc questions, not crying, talking to friends in a clinical fashion, etc,
I have had the CT tests, the PET- CT test, the bronchoscopy, the blood tests. Surgery is next week and a procedure called VATS - Video Assisted Thorasic Surgery.- is being used.(Three incisions around the tumor are made: one for the video, one for the surgeon, one for the drainage tube. Hospital stay approximately 5 days. Was told by doc this is the best kind of cancer a person can get. Will probably have to do chemo afterwards (and lose by long curly locks!) So I was okay with all of this - it is what it is, I reasoned. But as the surgery date looms closer and I read entries on these on-line forums, I am getting scared. Two weeks ago I was rushed to the hospital with breathing problems and severe chest pains. The doc could not reason what happened.
The breathing gets worse every day, After completing a small activity, my breathing becomes labored and then the chest pain starts (like an elephant sitting on my chest stabbing me with a knife.) The nebulizer medication makes me shake so badly I have stopped using it.
Please, if you have the time, could you please drop a line and let me know if I am being unreasonable in my feelings or does everyone with cancer go through these feelings of fear and nervousness. I have been sick most of my life with a variety of illnesses and have never been frightened like this.
Thank you for sharing and for your time.
honey all your feelings are validated. it is so scarey, the future is unknown, we are left to wonder, but remember god knew you before you were born and he knows you now, he is real, he is right there, we belong to him. let him carry you thru, we are never alone, when i went thru my cancer treatment i was in philly alone, but i wasn't alone, i had a big picture of jesus i ask him everyday to heal me, confort me ,be with me. my body belongs to him after all and he died for me, so really i am already healed....claim that healing grab it, stay close to god, take each day slowly, if you get afraid just call his name, when i look back, i know i did not humanly go thru this he carried me. and he will carry you, now that he has healed me it is not business as usual in my life, i have a whole new perspective that i could never have learned in any other school. and i still wake each day and ask to let me serve anyway he needs me, after all i belong to him, he gave me my life back, what else is ther. it is a journey, he is right there always. god bless you oh yeah i did not have hair for 2 years, and i was a hairdresser for 25 years, how about that slap....god showed me how uninportant that all is. now my hair is long and wild again,i look at it now and laugh.no more fighting those worthless issues, i got better thing to do. i am healed. praise him and i do everyday, thankyou for listening.