On 5/14/2008 olgirl wrote:
I found out a year ago I have HPV and it hasn't cleared up. On Monday I had a leep, which was very painful. I am horrified and freaked out what the future holds. I am 32 and still want to have children, I can't stop crying about things. I know I need to stop feeling sorry for myself, but I have no one to talk to, other than my boyfrien, I don't want any of my friends or family to know. I look back now on not always using protection, but the men I have been with have been minimal and always in a serious relationship. I got HPV from my current boyfriend, and a part of me is furious at him. I try not to let it show, but my emotions are all over the place.
Please don't beat yourself up about it. 80% of women will have come in contact and contracted the HPV virus, whether they used protection or not. Sadly it is one of those sneaky viruses that most of us don't even know we have. Some manage to fight it and some don't. It can take up to 2-3years. Also there are over a 100 different strains. So even though your partner may have it, it doesn't necessarily mean you have the same strain. It is usually the strain that does not involve warts, that cause the CIN etc. The most common ones being 16 and 18.
I understand you wanting to keep it to yourself, but remember the statistics. Sadly, too many of us feel the stigma attached to HPV, and it prevents us from talking openly about it. This probably doesn't help the stigma. The vaccination for cervical cancer, is actually for HPV, but they don't mention it in the ads. Very sad, cause so many women don't even realise it causes most of the Cancers of the cervix. If you want to talk about it, make sure you include the statistics. Even a woman who has had just one partner her whole life can still be infected with HPV if her partner was active prior to their relationship.
Smoking can accelerate the cell changes, so stop if you are a smoker. This is very relevant. Plus, stress does not help your body to fight. So find anyway to relax. Tell yourself you are healing everyday. Take a course of multivitamins, eat healthy and exercise.
You will still be able to have children, I have. So don't let this cause you stress. Focus on now, and you. Make sure you keep all of your follow up appointments too.
Take care, and be strong.
Mandy