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Final Update: Husband Passed Last Week

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Subject: Final Update: Husband passed last week
Date: 02/19/2008

Unfortunately my Husband of 27 years, at 48, SCC left tonsil w/mets lost his battle last week.  He fought such a tough fight against this SCC.  We were blessed that he made it through Christmas, that was his wish, that his sons not have to dread the Holidays for sake of his Memory.

 He was diagnosed in May (Mothers Day is when the symptoms became obvious) and underwent chemo (9 weeks) and radiation (2 times a day for 90 treatments), and refused to have a PEG even though he went down to 95 pounds, unfortunately PT's showed 8 weeks after treatment that the cancer, although smaller, was still very much there and appeared to have metasticized to the other side of the neck.  More Chemo (MD Anderson Center in Orlando) and a scheduled BiLateral Radical Neck Dissection several days before Thanksgiving but when they went in to do the surgery they discovered that the cancer had traveled everywhere, including the skull, brain, etc. and they did not continue (Thank Goodness!  He would have never recovered from the surgery and we would have had less time with him).

He continued Chemo until New Years Eve when he just could not do anymore.  He went from 145 before getting sick to 75 pounds and REFUSED to give up.  He even asked me, the week before he passed, when he was going to start chemo again. 

Our blessing was that he was able to be at home with us.  Hospice was our saving grace, without them he would have been in a hospital and miserable to the end. 

I appreciate all the support that I got from all of you here on this message board.  It was fantastic to have someone that understands what you are going through there to lean on when you get scared, angry, confused (amazing how many emotions apply here!) or to share great news.

This illness did something for us though, it brought us closer together as a family, brought us closer to our friends that were there with us and taught us to appreciate the little things as well as the big things. 

We had a beautiful service for him, complete with a sailboat, dive equipment, a cold beer in sand from the beach and fishing lures (all his favorite things) that brought out the best stories from everyone.  We celebrated his life and will cherish the love we felt in that room forever.

For those of you fighting this disease and the rest of you fighting along side someone with it NEVER give up!  My husband lost his battle but you WILL win yours!  As my husband said so many times "Attitude is what takes you further down the road or just down".  Keep yours up!

L. 

This is the quote I used in his obituary and at the service. 

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do.

So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails.

Explore. Dream. Discover.

                     -Mark Twain

Messages History for "Final Update: Husband Passed Last Week"

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