I don't have the energy to write the whole history down right now but I am so frustrated with my mother's oncologist I just want to scream and cry.
she has stage 4 stomach cancer. diagnosed the first wk in november. she cannot finish a third round of chemo. she has started and stopped this round three times due to infections that put her in the hospital. the first was with pneumonia, this last time with a blood infection. she decided to remove her port and take a break. she's tired of the hospital.
I have been asking the doctor at every appointment if we could try something else. if he would refer her out and stop what he is doing since it doesn't work. she hasn't even had a pet scan since december.
after asking where is the cancer and hearing "it has spread outside the stomach" in January and saying "where???" we heard in the lymph nodes. My brother called in february and somehow the doctor was now telling him it has spread to her bowels and pancreas. WHAT?? how are we getting that info now?
we met with the doctor the following week and tried to get him to tell her what he told us and we are all playing chicken. we are terrified it will have her lose all hope if she hears that it has spread.. but then we feel that she cannot get proper treatment or make the best decisions since she doesn't know.
she doesn't want to know but she doesn't want to give up, I know she doesn't.
she's alone and we are all far away from her.
I'm really upset and stressed and the waiting to have 3 minutes with her oncologist every three weeks is time that is wasting but then maybe there is really nothing to do.
I just want this to be different. I can't stop wanting to do something and I'm helpless.
she's got a cough now. I'm worried that it has spread to her lungs.
by the time we get the pet scan will it be to late?