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45,5Month After Op And Going Strong

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Caregiver
Christina23
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Subject: RE: 45,5month after op and going strong
Date: 04/03/2008

oh no no no! 

 We are by far the longest survivors.  There is a guy named Jeff who has been living with this cancer for 8 years.  Truly a miracle.  Not that the cancer is gone, but he has been fighting it and so far winning his battle.  You can look him up and others on Cholangiocarcinoma.org.  This is a great site and the response you get from the people is triple what you receive on this site.

How I am dealing...... Wow!  That is a tough questions.  It has been really hard.  When first diagnosed, the hospital we were at deemed him inoperable.  They said that the 8.5 tumor was too big and in a very difficult place to remove.  This was the worst part.  Feeling almost helpless.  I put our lives in God's hands and just prayed everyday for a Dr. that would at least take a chance.  We did find a great Dr. which I am soooo thankful for.  He removed over 70% of the liver in what turned out to be a 16 hour surgery.  My fiance had many complcations while in the hospital including muscle tissue infections, blood infections, fluid build up in the lungs, a vessel that burst in his stomach and starting vomiting up blood but you know what HE IS HERE! With me everyday and how can I say I am dealing.  Pretty well I guess.  The hardest part for me is looking on the positive and being thankful.  Pushing the negative feelings away.  Hearing another ones story and being scared of recurrence.  I try to tell our story and help as much as possible.  I wished someone would have been around for me to life my spirits when first diagnosed and deemed inoperable. 

Dealing to me has just been never giving up.  Take the negative and searching for positive.  Looking to God for strength and praying for a good life.  Not letting fear get in the way of my happiness.  Thanking God for what he has given me and praying that it will stay.  Being strong for myself before being strong for him.  This is important.  I tried being strong for him and it broke me down.  I felt as if "what about what I need" sorry for the long msg. If you would like to know more feel free to contact me. 

Don't just pray for a miracle, expect one.

Christina

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