Jessica, Please do not give up hope. You have been through so much and you are entitled to your anxiety and depression, but there is hope. I know how debilitating anxiety disorder can be as I too have it. It is crippling. And, of course, your health issues do not help the situation. My husband just passed from stomach cancer on February 22 - he had stage IV cancer for three years. Three years with stage IV - unbelievable. Even though he was sick from chemo and radiation, discouraged, anxious, he still fought til the very end. I cannot imagine what you are experiencing, but life is so precious. If you are a praying person, ask for strength and release from your anxiety. This board is so cathartic - everyone is very supportive. Please keep posting and let us know how you make out. You are in my prayers.
Diane