Writing this is very difficult. My wife has been getting treatments for about 6 months for Stage IIIA NSCLC. She has had 34 radiation treatments and is in the middle of chemo. The radiation was strong enough that she had 2nd degree burns on her back. Her chemo is three sets of: 2 drugs one week, 1 drug the next week, and off a week. She is on her second set, but has had the 1 drug treatment delayed 3 times because of bad blood counts. She has had a platelet transfusion and a whole blood transfusion. We go tomorrow to try to get her treatment. She is scheduled for a PET scan on Monday to see how the treatments are doing. She should have been done with the chemo. The radiation doctor scheduled the scan several weeks ago.
She has developed a terrible pain in her right leg and has been xrayed, that showed nothing, and last week had a bone scan. She now spends most of her time in bed sleeping. I help her in and out of bed and she has difficulty walking. I usually help her get dressed because she can't lift her leg.
Our families are very supportive and we have friends who have been having us to dinner or bringing over meals. My wife does not whine or complain.
However, I am showing signs of depression. I realize that it can be dangerous, but I can't bring myself to talk about it to anyone face to face. So, I am giving this a shot.
We have been married 40 years. We do most thing together. We have traveled extensively and often take our two young granddaughters on trips. I am not complaining about taking care of her and harbor no resentments. She may very well recover and end up taking care of me some day. We have talked about that. During the day time goes fast, but the nights are different. It is now well after mid-night. I think I will go to bed.
I would be interested in relevant feedback from spouses or partners.
Thanks
JW