It seems like this horrible nightmare that progressively gets worse. In and out of the hospital, ups and downs. Emotionally drained! I feel like I can't breathe or sleep and I feel guilty for living. My Dad...my hero. He has been though so much and continues his up hill battle daily. He wants to give up. I understand his reasoning but I can't make my heart understand. He is everything to me. He is the reason for my existance and I want to do everything to make him better BUT I can't. I have to help him get through this. I can't let go. I can't see him suffer anymore. I know, I am selfish, I am a coward because I fall to pieces when he needs me. Ia m so confused and so hurt that this is happening to him.